My Dark Life
by Moon Raven2
Summary: While undercover, Heero and Duo encounter Renya Calnar, a young woman with a shadowy past and uncertain future. Will the secrets she's hiding destroy the pilots forever? Complete!
1. A Kink in the World

My Dark Life part 1  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
PG  
Originally posted on NYS  
Disclaimers and notes:  
Last time I checked I didn't own Gundam Wing. I'd check again, but I'm sure  
the same still applies... oh yeah! I do own Renya Calnar, Bright Claw and   
the Cal'sha, though. Damn I'm impressive!!  
  
The title comes from the song "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello. As far as  
I know, the only place it can be found is on the X-Files TV soundtrack (not  
to be confused with the *movie* soundtrack!). It's really slow and kinda   
creepy (X-Files, remember?!), and I thought it fit the story rather well.   
No infringement intended!!  
  
My first Gundam Wing fanfic. Geeeeez... sometimes I really do bite off more   
than I can chew. Oh well. Um... I'm not as familiar with the Universe of GW  
as I am with, say... Sailor Moon or something. Because of that, I would ask   
that you please be nice. Please. :) I've done my best.  
  
I was trying to figure out where in the timeline I could set my story, and   
then I saw that episode where Heero and Duo transfered to a new school and   
Relena was there for some reason. She saw Heero (does the chicky have   
*radar*!? And if so, can I get some??!!) and said something about needing to  
be close to him for a little bit longer or something. Anyway, I was like,   
"Woohoo! New school, new place... perfecto!" So tada! That's when this  
story takes place... right after the big hooha at New Edwards.  
  
Hope you enjoy! C&C most DEFINITELY welcome!!!!  
--------------------  
"She says,   
'Nobody wants to believe you're the same as everyone.  
What makes me unique?'  
My dark life.  
There was a kink in the world,  
Sent that statue tumbling.  
An invitation east so we can watch it all crumbling."  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
--------------------  
My Dark Life part 1  
  
  
Her amber-green eyes locked with his dark blue ones as they approached one   
another in the hallway. Recognition danced in the pit of her stomach, tapped  
icy fingers against the back of her neck, and her head swiveled so that she   
wouldn't have to release his frosty, penetrating gaze as he passed her.   
Finally, almost as one, they both looked away.  
  
"Do you know her, Heero?" his companion asked brightly.  
  
"No," the boy replied, his voice as cold and hard as his eyes.  
  
"Sure was pretty... funny, I didn't think the great Heero Yuy could be   
bothered with such things as pretty girls."  
  
Heero gave the other boy such a steely glare that his jaw closed with an   
audible *clack* and he said not another word about the subject.  
  
Meanwhile, the girl's friends had noticed her errant gaze as well. "Oohh,   
Renya-chan, who is that boy? He's awfully kawaii!!" one of them said with a   
giggle.  
  
"I don't know," she replied in a soft, wondering little voice. "I don't   
believe I've ever seen him before."  
  
"He's a new student... his friend, too. Their names are Heero Yuy and Duo  
Maxwell. Which is which, I wonder?" another girl spoke up.  
  
"How do *you* know so much, Mieko-chan?" the first girl demanded.  
  
"Mieko-chan makes it her business to know everything about everyone!" a   
fourth said with a laugh.  
  
Renya tuned out the happy, busy chatter of her friends as she pondered the   
strange feelings she'd received from that boy. She knew she had never seen   
him before, yet he had seemed so familiar... like... like a memory from a   
dream. "Heero," she murmured, for surely that was his name. It was as   
familiar - and yet unfamiliar - to her as his face had been.  
  
--------  
Thank the Gods it was finally lunchtime! Renya was starving, having missed   
breakfast that morning, and she had packed herself a huge lunch. Finally   
released from the gaggle of girls she called friends, the dark-haired girl   
went quickly to her usual spot to enjoy the quiet, peaceful hour before her   
next class.  
  
She rounded the corner of the building and hurried across the back lawn for   
the shadowy corner hidden by a large hedge of blackberry bushes. Checking to  
make sure no one was watching, she slipped from the bright sunlight and into   
the soft, dim space between the hedge and the fence. The sight that met her   
eyes caused her to stop dead and let out a quiet curse. Then her cheeks   
reddened and she bowed her head in apology. "Gomen! I didn't know anyone   
would be here... I didn't know anyone knew about this place at all! This is   
where I usually have lunch, you see..." She trailed off, embarrassed.  
  
"It's all right," the boy with the long brown braid said with a friendly   
smile. "We didn't mean to intrude on your space. We'll leave."  
  
"Nai! That is... it's not my place, really. You were here first." She   
turned to go, but the sound of his voice stopped her.  
  
"Matte. Why don't you join us?"  
  
"Duo!" the other boy hissed.   
  
  
  
"Don't mind Heero here... he's just shy. Come on, we'd love some company!"   
he offered in such a friendly, cheerful voice that Renya couldn't resist.  
  
At last she nodded. "Arigato. I'm Renya Calnar, by the way."  
  
"I'm Duo Maxwell, and he's Heero Yuy. Nice to meet you, Renya-san." He   
motioned for her to sit across from them, and she knelt warily, smoothing the  
pleated blue skirt of her uniform down over her knees.  
  
"You are new here?" she asked politely. "Where did you transfer from?"  
  
They shared a glance, and at last Heero said, "A much smaller school than   
this one, very far from here. You've probably not heard of it."  
  
Recognizing something in his voice, she arched a dark brow. "Not heard of   
it? Why, Heero-san, hasn't everyone heard of the school that Relena Darlian   
attends?"  
  
Something flickered in his dark blue eyes. "How do you know that name?"  
  
"I know more than the *name*, Heero-san. Relena is a good friend of mine.   
She told me of the events that conspired at the time of her father's death."  
  
"All of the events?" Duo asked in a tense voice.  
  
She glanced at him, puzzled, before shaking her head. "Nai. She said there   
were things she could not tell me, and we left it at that. She mentioned,   
however, that she might transfer here, and that two boys she knew from her   
current school already had."  
  
"Why would she do that? I thought she liked it there."   
  
"Why do you think, Duo-san?" she replied with a pointed look in Heero's   
direction. "It is hard to find a stronger call than that of one's heart,   
ne?"  
  
"I know nothing of that," Heero replied stiffly.  
  
"No, I suppose you wouldn't."   
  
An uncomfortable silence fell as the two stared at one another, trapped in a   
face-off that Duo couldn't begin to understand. Clearing his throat, he   
said, "So, Renya-san, what's your next class?"  
  
That broke the tension, and she wrinkled her small, slightly upturned nose in  
displeasure. "Algebra. I hate math, and the teacher is such a bore. My   
last class is Chinese Literature, though... it's my favorite." She began   
unpacking her pale blue obento, and she and Duo fell into an easy   
conversation about classes and teachers and the other students.  
  
Heero sat back, his own lunch untouched, and watched them. Who was this   
strange girl? How did she know Relena? Why did she seem so familiar to him?  
Her name echoed around inside his skull, and the memory of her amber-green   
eyes filled his vision. ~Renya Calnar... maybe I can ask Dr. J - no. He is   
not there to answer my questions, only to give me orders.~  
  
"Oh!" the girl cried suddenly, jumping to her feet. "That's my bell. Good   
afternoon, Duo-san, Heero-san. It was nice to meet you!" With that and a   
wave, she slipped around the hedge and was gone.  
  
Duo let out a long, low whistle and leaned back on his elbows. "Wow! I was   
wrong before when I said she was pretty - that girl is full-on *gorgeous*,   
don'tcha think?"  
  
Heero, per usual, said nothing.  
  
"Oh come on!" he cried, disgusted. "I'm sorry, Heero, but even you had to   
notice!"  
  
"What I noticed," he said icily, "was you flirting with a girl who has   
nothing to do with our mission. We don't have time for things like this,   
Duo."  
  
The other boy sat up quickly, cross-legged, and rested his elbows on his   
knees. "I was just talkin' to her! What is it you're always sayin'?   
'The only way to live a good life is by listening to your emotions.'   
Close enough, anyway!! Well, my emotions are talkin', Heero, and I'm   
listenin'!"  
  
A corner of the dark-haired boy's mouth lifted ever so slightly. "I don't   
think it's your *emotions* you're listening to in this case."  
  
It was the closest Duo had ever heard his friend come to a joke, and instead   
of taking offense, he threw back his head and laughed long and loud.   
  
----------  
"Bye, Mieko-chan!" Renya called to her friend as they parted ways at the door  
of their Chinese Literature class. Renya turned quickly, in a hurry to be   
away from school and on her way home, and ran right into Duo Maxwell. "Oh!   
Duo-san, gomen! I seem to be apologizing to you an awful lot today!"  
  
"Only because I've been constantly under foot," he said with a charming   
half-smile, eyes sparkling mischievously.   
  
She grinned in return. "I wouldn't go that far, Duo-san. Sorry to run off   
so quickly, but I really must get home," she said, moving past him on down   
the hall.  
  
"Home?" he asked, hurrying to catch up with her. "You don't live on campus?"  
  
"No," she said with a shake of her head, "I live with my... father in town."  
  
Her hesitation over the word "father" puzzled him, but he ignored it for the   
moment. "Well perhaps I could walk you?" he offered brightly. "It's the   
least I could do after stealing your lunch spot and nearly knocking you   
over."  
  
She glanced over at him, amused, as she opened her wooden locker and pulled   
out her shoes. "As thankful as I am for the offer, it really isn't   
necessary. The spot isn't mine, like I said, and I wasn't looking where I   
was going when I ran into you." She hurriedly traded her school shoes for   
the ones she wore outside before tossing the former pair back in the locker   
and closing it again.  
  
"Onegai, Renya-san?" he asked with a hopeful light glowing in his dark blue   
eyes. "You see, my only friend here is Heero, and while I do like him, he   
doesn't talk very much, and I often find myself wondering if he's even   
capable of laughter..." She chewed her lower lip indecisively, but he could   
tell she was close to cracking. "Come on, come on! It's good karma to take   
pity on the poor, lonely new boy," he said miserably.  
  
She laughed. "All right then, come along. I'll get in trouble if I'm late."  
  
"Thank you, oh great Renya-sama!" She laughed again, and his heart did a   
bothersome little flip-flop at the sound. ~Oh dear,~ he thought, ~Heero's   
not gonna like this one bit!~ "So where do you live?" he asked as they   
crossed the bright, lushly green expanse of the school's lawn.  
  
"Not far. It isn't a very big village. What made you and Heero both decide   
to transfer to this school anyway? Are your fathers in the military? Were   
they transferred to the base near here?" Her questions were innocent and   
good-natured, but he sensed something a little odd behind them, and he tensed  
involuntarily.  
  
"Heero and I are orphans," he said at last. "We pretty much make our own   
decisions. You know Relena Darlian, and you seem to be aware of the strange   
feelings she has for Heero - it was freakin' him out."  
  
She laughed. "Only a boy like Heero-san could be freaked out by the   
affections of a girl as pretty as Relena Darlian!"  
  
"That's the truth. I don't get it. Heero's a strange bird."  
  
"I guess being orphaned will do that to you," she said softly, startling him   
into looking up from the sidewalk his gaze was trained on to meet kind,   
gentle amber-green eyes.  
  
"I don't know," he said at last. "Being orphaned didn't do it to *me*."  
  
"Didn't it?" she asked, an eyebrow arched in the manner she had when her   
questions were especially dead-on and probing. He glanced away   
uncomfortably, and she smiled. "I'm sorry, Duo-san. I should be more   
tactful, but I forget sometimes that not everyone enjoys having their souls   
torn out through their noses. I ask only because I know how being orphaned   
changed me, and I thought we might perhaps have some common ground."  
  
"But I thought you said you live with your father," he said quickly, but then  
recalling her trouble with the word.  
  
"I said that, yes, but he's not my father. My parents are dead... I never   
knew them. Did you and Heero know yours?"  
  
"Nai... sometimes I think it's easier that way. Sometimes I'm not so sure.   
I have this image of them, ya know? This idea of the perfect set of   
parents... maybe that's better than remembering the flawed, human reality -   
whatever it was."  
  
She shook her head fervently, and her hand on his arm stopped him mid-stride.  
"No, Duo-san, please don't say that! Being human, being flawed... it's what   
life is about! Think about it! What if we all lived up to each other's   
perfect visions? What if there was no pain or death or hardship? Would we   
then be able to enjoy the goodness of life? Would we understand how sweet a   
simple embrace can be, how much heartbreakingly wonderful power a mere touch   
of lip against lip can have over the human soul? Life and humans are full of  
darkness, Duo-san, but without the darkness there would be no light."  
  
He stared down at her wonderingly, at the passion glowing in her slightly   
slanted amber-green eyes, at the color staining her high cheek bones, at how   
small and elegant her hand looked against his arm, and he let out a slow   
exhalation of breath that fell somewhere between a sigh of longing and a gasp  
of wonder. "Who *are* you?" he murmured after a moment.  
  
Everything changed so abruptly that Duo was left dizzy. Fear replaced   
passion, pallor replaced color, and the hand tensed so sharply that it almost  
hurt him. She stepped away quickly and her smile was a ghost of a thing as   
she said, "I'm me, of course! Renya Calnar, just like I said this morning...  
I didn't mean to startle you with my foolishness. Oh, look! We're here!   
That's my house over there," she said, pointing across the road. "Thank you   
for the walk, Duo-san! Ja!"   
  
Before he could manage to utter another word, she was across the street and   
through the door painted a bright, merry red. He let out another sigh - this  
one like that of a man very recently punched in the gut - and just stood   
there a moment, staring at the little house and wondering about the occupants  
therein, before he turned and made his slow, thoughtful way back to school.   
  
----------  
She leaned back against the door as it closed behind her, hand still on the   
knob. What an idiot! What a complete, total, brainless fool she was! Why   
had she said those things to him? Why had she allowed him to walk her home?  
Her head bowed as she sighed, and she felt her hair tickle her cheeks as it   
brushed past her face. What was she doing with this boy? There was too much  
at stake to be risking it all over a charming half-smile and a pair of kind   
blue eyes. It just wasn't like her at all!  
  
With another sigh, this one resigned, she slipped off her shoes, set her   
school bag aside, and began making her slow way up the stairs. He would want  
to know all about Duo, especially why she had stood outside their house   
talking to him. Her only hope was that he wouldn't scold her too harshly.  
  
"Who was that boy, Renya?" he asked upon seeing her.  
  
"No one, sensei," she replied quietly.  
  
"Someone, clearly. You seemed very interested in talking to him. Is he from  
school?"  
  
"Yes, sensei. He's a new student, and he hasn't many friends. He asked to   
walk me home, and I said yes. He seemed like a perfectly nice boy."  
  
"A new student, you say? What's his name?"  
  
"Duo Maxwell, sensei," she said in the same respectful tone she always used   
when addressing him. "A friend transferred with him... a strange, quiet boy   
named Heero Yuy. Should that sound familiar to me, sensei?"  
  
"Of course it should, child," he scolded. "Heero Yuy was the pacifist leader  
of the Colonies. He wanted peace between the Colonies and the United Earth   
Sphere Alliance, but he was assassinated. Really, what *do* they teach you   
in that school?"  
  
"Nothing as useful as that which you do, sensei," she replied dutifully.  
  
"Condescending child. Go do your chores!" She moved quickly to do as he   
told, and once she was gone he raised the claw that served as his left hand   
and scratched his chin slowly and thoughtfully. "Heero Yuy, eh? Well, well,  
well... I knew it was only a matter of time before he came to my corner of   
the world. Coincidence? Of course, naturally... but such a strange one."   
----------  
  
End 1 


	2. You're a Tourist at Best

My Dark Life part 2  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
PG  
Blahblahblah:  
I don't own Gundam Wing! Damn. :( Renya and Bright Claw are mine (mine,   
I say, not *me*), though, so please be nice and don't steal them. Thank   
you.  
  
Big doin's today, folks! Enjoy. :) Oh... and the song verse seems   
especially appropriate for this chapter. And you wanna know the best part?   
I wrote it before I even decided to use this song!! Wahoo!!  
  
C&C welcome and appreciated!!  
-------------  
"She came off like a light,  
And so softly she spoke:  
'You don't know, no you don't know  
About my dark life.'  
And you think you're a guest;  
You're a tourist at best,  
Peering into the corners of my dark life."  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
--------------  
My Dark Life part 2  
  
  
Several days passed, and Renya did everything in her power to avoid the two   
boys. She didn't know which she dreaded more - the strange, misplaced   
familiarity she felt around Heero, or the confused stomach knots she   
experienced in Duo's presence. For the next three days she managed to see   
them only in passing, and not speak to them at all except for the occasional   
"hello," and that was only to Duo. She felt that Heero would just as soon   
kill her as look at her - and that went pretty much the same for everyone he   
knew.  
  
On the fourth day Renya was in her usual lunch spot - always empty since the   
day she had found Heero and Duo there - struggling with a translation for her  
Literature class that afternoon. She peered down at the characters that were  
beginning to look like wriggling... somethings... and considered very   
seriously that she must be insane for voluntarily subjecting herself to this   
torture. Suddenly the sound of shoes against soft grass caught her   
attention, and she looked up quickly.  
  
"Hi," he said quietly, the look on his face one of such pained, hopeful   
contrition that her heart softened and she found herself struggling not to   
smile.  
  
She tapped her eraser against the pages of her notebook a moment before   
returning to her work - or pretending to, anyway - and saying, "Hello,   
Duo-kun."  
  
Her change from the formal "san" to the much more familiar "kun" was plenty   
for him. With a blinding smile, he collapsed down onto the grass near her.   
"Whatcha workin' on?" he asked as though the last three days of frosty,   
strained silence between them had never occurred.  
  
She smiled gratefully down at the little characters before glancing up at him  
again. "Just some translating. I feel like I'm banging my head against a   
brick wall." She sighed, deciding she might as well call it quits, and   
shoved her things into her schoolbag.  
  
His hand went behind his head in that way she noticed he had when nervous,   
and he laughed slightly. "Yeah, I'm no good at things like translations. It  
was hard enough going from English to Japanese, much less translating   
Japanese into something like Mandarin!!"  
  
His words were lost on her as she noticed the arm he currently had up in the   
air. "Duo-kun," she asked in a concerned voice, "whatever did you do to your  
arm?" He usually wore the sleeves of his white shirt rolled up; Heero had   
that habit, too, she'd noticed; but today they were rolled down lower, and   
the end of an ugly red welt peeked out.  
  
"Huh?" he asked, confused. Then, catching on, he lowered the arm quickly.   
"Nothing... it's fine." He laughed again, more nervously than ever, and she   
took his wrist in her hand and pushed the sleeve up.  
  
A gasp escaped her lips without consent as she stared down at the long,   
painful looking burn. "How did you do this, Duo-kun?" she demanded.  
  
His face was flooded with color, and he tried to pull from her grasp, but she  
was very much stronger than she looked. "It's ok, really! I just... I just   
burnt myself on the stove..."  
  
"You don't have a stove." She let out a sigh. "All right, Duo-kun, I won't   
press... and I'm going to show you something I've never shown anyone before."  
Her hand passed over the wound and it disappeared. "My gift," she said   
softly, amber-green eyes meeting shocked blue ones, "and my apology for the   
way I've been treating you."  
  
He stared at her for a long time, and she didn't let go of him, and the   
fingers of his free hand curled over hers as they held onto his arm.   
Something... he leaned toward her, sensing a change, but suddenly her   
fingertips came up and softly pressed themselves against his lips. "Iie,   
Duo-kun," she murmured in a heartbreakingly painful tone. "I can't."  
  
Releasing him and standing up abruptly, she grabbed her bag and moved to go,   
hesitating at the edge of the bushes. She didn't turn to look back, or she   
would've seen that he still sat facing where she had been a moment before,   
his head bowed in confused wonderment. "It's not you, Duo, please don't   
think that. I just... I'm trouble. My life..." She sighed. "There are too  
many things you don't know about me, Duo-kun," she said finally, desperately,  
her voice hollow and sad.  
  
Quietly he glanced back at her, reading the tension in the way she held   
herself, the pain that left its mark along the lines of her back. "Can I  
walk you home today, Renya-chan?" he murmured at last.  
  
Her head whipped around, and he marveled at the tears brightening her eyes.   
"Arigato, Duo-kun," she whispered before taking off around the hedge and away  
from him.  
  
He stared after her a moment before throwing his hands up in exaltation.   
With a luxurious sigh, he plucked a stem of grass and fell back to rest with   
his arms crossed behind his head. He watched the shifting patterns of   
sunlight through leaves and realized quite suddenly that Renya Calnar *was*   
trouble... but that he didn't give a damn, no matter what Heero said about   
duty or anything thing else for that matter.  
  
-----  
"It's not that I don't like the village, or the school... I'm just sick of   
living in the same place and seeing the same people day in and day out.   
Everything here is so small. It must be a huge change from your old school,"  
Renya was saying that afternoon as they meandered toward her house.  
  
"It's kind of nice, actually. Back there, everyone was all abuzz over Relena  
all the time. I like Relena... I guess, I don't really know her that well...  
but it's nice to be somewhere where she isn't the topic of conversation on   
everyone's lips all the time."  
  
She nodded slowly. "Relena has that quality. Sometimes I envy it, and   
sometimes I couldn't be more thankful to be free of it."  
  
Duo glanced over at her, surprised. "You think you don't have it?"  
  
"You think I *do*?" she asked, even more surprised than he.  
  
He grinned, abashed, and looked away. "Yeah, but it's different than Relena.  
I don't know... hard to explain, I guess."  
  
A silence fell, and Renya chewed thoughtfully on her lower lip. "Duo-kun,"   
she began hesitantly, "would you tell me something?"  
  
"Hai, of course. I am a virtual font of knowledge!"  
  
She grinned, but then her face grew grave again. "Your arm... Duo-kun, tell   
me truly how you hurt it."  
  
He let out a long sigh. "I can't. I would if I could, Renya-chan, I swear,   
but I just can't. It's a secret, and... it isn't mine alone to tell."  
  
"Heero," she murmured. "Duo-kun-" She stopped abruptly and grabbed his   
hand, pulling him onto a side road. "Duo, I know we don't know each other   
very well," she said quietly, threading her arm through his so she could keep  
her voice low, "but I believe you and I are very much alike. I'll just tell   
you that it looked like a welding burn, and I'll leave you to fill in the   
blanks."  
  
He came to a dead stop and turned to stare at her. "How do you know what a   
welding burn looks like, Renya?" he asked, surprise making his voice louder   
than he intended. Passersby were turning to stare at them, so she tugged   
him along before forming a reply.  
  
"The same way you do, Duo-kun," she breathed near his ear.   
  
"I don't think that's possible," he whispered back.  
  
"Are you and Heero two of the Gundam pilots who destroyed the New Edwards   
base?" she demanded suddenly.  
  
"Renya-"  
  
"Matte! I'm not asking as an accusation, Duo. I'm asking because I need to   
be able to trust you. If you are one of them, then I know you'll keep my   
secret."  
  
"Because you'll keep *mine*?!" he hissed angrily.  
  
"This isn't blackmail! I want to... I want to be able to trust you, Duo. I   
sense something in you, something I've never felt before. I want to show you  
the truth about... about me."  
  
He glanced over at her curiously, and he could see the sad longing in her   
amber-green eyes. "Hai, Renya-chan," he muttered at last.  
  
She glanced around quickly. "All right then... come on. It's this way, not   
far." She grabbed his hand and they walked nonchalantly down a long alley.   
It dead-ended into a steel door that Renya opened without knocking.  
  
"They don't keep it locked?" he asked wonderingly.  
  
"This is just the façade. On in is the important stuff." They threaded   
their way through stack upon stack of empty packing crates before they came   
to a much smaller door, this one set with a keypad and a fingerprint ID. She  
pressed her hand against it and said, "Renya Calnar." A green light   
illuminated and the door opened with a muffled whoosh. "This way," she said.  
"Stay close."  
  
He had no intention of doing anything else. The space was huge and deeply   
dark, but she led the way surely and easily. After a moment she reached into  
her bag and pulled out a flashlight.  
  
As the beam fell on the object before them, Duo felt as though he suddenly   
couldn't breathe. "It's a Gundam," he whispered.  
  
"My Gundam," she replied. "Bright Claw."  
  
He stared up at the huge mobile suit, and his eyes landed on the source of   
its name. Attached to the top of the right hand was the biggest,   
deadliest-looking claw he had ever seen; the razor sharp blades reflected the  
light in a merry, yet menacing, way. Releasing her hand, he circled the suit  
and saw two long, gently curved blades - like giant katana - strapped to its   
back. "Why are you showing me this?" he asked at last, returning to her   
side.  
  
She let out a little puff of air and smiled slightly. "My father - the man I  
*call* 'father' - insists that I ally myself to OZ. Such has been my destiny  
since I was *born*;" she spat the word bitterly; "but recently I find myself   
disagreeing with his decision."  
  
"Why?"  
  
He had noticed that she always wore around her left wrist a thick, black   
leather bracelet. It was a strange bit of jewelry that clung to her skin   
like a cuff, and he had often wondered at it. Now, with a tug, she took it   
off and held out the underside of her wrist for his inspection. On it was a   
small, black tattoo shaped like a cat's claw.  
  
"My God!" he gasped. "Where did you get that?" He recognized it perfectly   
well; several years ago a huge scandal surrounded the United Earth Sphere   
Alliance over a small, peaceful race of people living in some remote corner   
of South America. The Alliance had decided they were a nuisance - no one   
knew quite *why* they decided this - and had proceeded to destroy the entire   
group. This tattoo on the inside of Renya Calnar's wrist was exactly like   
the one every member of that tribe had born.  
  
"I was born with it," she told him. "You know of the Cal'sha, obviously."   
  
He nodded.  
  
"The reason I have no parents is because I was genetically engineered. The   
man I call father is the scientist who created me. I'm half Cal'sha, half...  
not."  
  
"Why Cal'sha?" he asked at last, head spinning.  
  
"The reason OZ - don't be fooled into thinking it was the Alliance, Duo - had  
them destroyed is because they possessed certain... *special* abilities that   
OZ wanted to get their hands on. Several members of the race were captured   
for experimentation, the object of which being... well, me."  
  
"You. Who are you?"  
  
"The perfect Gundam pilot," she said simply, resentfully. "I can withstand   
things no ordinary human can, and my sight and reflexes are way above   
normal."  
  
"And your touch can heal."  
  
"Yes, that too. Duo, I-"  
  
"No," he said softly, holding up a hand as though it could stop the words   
from leaving her lips. "Please don't, Renya. Don't apologize or explain   
yourself or beg me to understand. You were created to pilot Gundams for OZ,   
ne?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And you don't want to?"  
  
"No! They killed my people, Duo!"  
  
"So you wish to join us?"  
  
"Yes. It seems like a better idea than fighting on my own."  
  
He let out a long sigh. "Heero is not gonna like this."  
  
She frowned deeply. "Is Heero your keeper? Duo, if you think a girl can't   
pilot a Gundam-"  
  
"What does that mean!?"  
  
"What do you think it means?! I'm a good pilot, Duo!! I'm better than Noin,  
better than Zechs even!" As soon as the words were out, she knew they were   
the wrong ones completely. "Don't look at me like that," she begged quietly,  
tears welling up in her eyes.  
  
"What do you want me to say, Renya? I wouldn't think OZ would design and   
train a bad pilot. Your skills have nothing to do with this." His voice was  
strangely solemn, and she stared at him with wide eyes.  
  
"Then what is this about, Duo? Do you want me or not?!"  
  
"That's just it!" he cried, and she took a startled step back as his voice   
echoed and reechoed through the hangar. "I don't want you to fight with us   
because I don't want you to get hurt," he said, lowering his voice   
considerably. "And I don't want you to get hurt because... damn it, Renya,   
don't you *know*!?"  
  
Her brow creased in a frown, and she reached across the darkness between them  
to lace her fingers through his. "Oh, Duo," she murmured.  
  
"Don't," he said, pulling his hand from hers. "I thought... I thought   
something was happening between us, Renya." His blue eyes were nearly black   
with humiliation in the glow of the flashlight. "I thought... I guess it   
doesn't matter what I thought. I was obviously wrong."  
  
She shook her head quickly, desperately. "Nai, Duo, onegai! You don't   
understand..." But he had disappeared into the darkness. "Duo!" she called   
softly. "Duo! You'll get lost! If someone found you here-"  
  
"Hey, who's in there?" a gruff voice called from the back of the hangar.  
  
Renya flicked off the flashlight and scanned the shadows with the excellent   
night vision that had been a gift of her strange genetic makeup. He was not   
far off, standing frozen by the sound of the voice, and a moment later she   
had grabbed him and pulled him behind a stack of boxes. He let out a gasp of  
surprise, but she pressed her hand over his mouth urgently. "If they find us  
we're both dead," she whispered, her mouth so close to his ear that he felt   
the brush of her lips against his skin.  
  
They knelt in the black silence, her arm still around his waist from where   
she'd unceremoniously dragged him into hiding, and strained to listen for   
footsteps. He felt her stiffen, and a few moments later heard what had   
caused the reaction: not one set of steps, but two! They were coming closer.  
  
"I swear I heard someone in here," the man who had called out to them said.  
  
"I don't see anything. How would someone get in here anyway?"  
  
"I don't know... you look over there and I'll check this side."  
  
"Right." The second man approached their hiding place, and both tried to   
keep their breathing as quiet as possible. "Come on, man, there ain't nobody  
in here. Let's go!" he said after a moment.  
  
"Yeah, I guess you're right," the first man agreed. "Come on. Let's not   
mention this to the doc, ok?"  
  
"Yeah, no problem."   
  
They didn't move until the clang of a closing door echoed through the   
emptiness, and then both let out the breath they were holding. "That was   
close!" he said softly.  
  
"No kidding!" she replied, still hanging onto him. He realized suddenly that  
she was shaking.  
  
"Renya-chan, are you all right?" he asked, concerned.  
  
"I thought they were going to find us. If sensei thought I told someone...   
especially you... I don't even want to think about it!"  
  
He straightened and reached down to pull her up beside him. "You took a huge  
risk to show me this, didn't you?"   
  
"The biggest risk I've ever taken in my life," she replied honestly.  
  
Unable to see her, he reached out and traced his fingertips over the features  
of her face; over her forehead, across the closed lids of her eyes, down the   
bridge of her nose, over her small, soft mouth. He splayed his hands across   
her cheeks, enjoying the silky feel of her skin beneath his palms, and moved   
close to kiss her tenderly. He pulled away and took her hand in his. "Come   
on," he said quietly, "I'll take you home. Tomorrow we can talk to Heero   
about all of this."  
  
-------  
"What do you mean she has a Gundam?" the dark-haired boy demanded of Duo   
later that evening.  
  
"I *mean* she *has a Gundam*. What do you *think* I mean, Heero?!"  
  
"How does that girl have a Gundam!?" His tone was agitated, and Duo wondered  
at it. He'd never heard Heero's voice have quite so much inflection before.  
  
"Apparently it's OZ' doings. She's a genetically engineered hybrid of human   
and Cal'sha... it's complicated... but basically she was created to be the   
perfect Gundam pilot. She hates OZ, though, because of what they did to the   
Cal'sha years ago. Do you remember? Anyway," he hurried on at the boy's   
dark glare, "her sensei - the man she tells everyone is her father - is also   
the man who created her, and the man who trained her to be a Gundam pilot.   
Heero, her machine is incredible!! It's got this huge claw... that's its   
name, actually: Bright Claw... and these two gigantic katana stuck on its   
back."  
  
Heero sat down hard on his bed, stunned beyond measure by the news. This   
strange girl... a Gundam pilot? How could such a thing be possible? Had Dr.  
J sent her? But no! That couldn't be, because Dr. J sent the five of them   
to fight *against* OZ... but now the girl was turning against OZ, too. Could  
it be because of orders? "What is the name of this sensei of hers?" he asked  
at last.  
  
Duo frowned suddenly, puzzled. "You know, I never thought to ask, and she   
didn't mention it."  
  
Heero's brow creased in thought as he stood and paced the length of the room   
quietly. "What does she have to do with us?" he said after a moment.  
  
"She wants to join us."  
  
"That isn't possible. We have our orders, Duo, and they don't include some   
strange runaway from OZ."  
  
"She isn't just 'some strange runaway,' Heero. We could use her. If she's   
as good as she says she is, then we need her. I'm sure the one who's giving   
us orders wouldn't mind if we brought along a little extra help."  
  
Heero studied the other boy carefully before saying, "I told you to watch out  
for her. I told you to stay *away* from her."  
  
Remembering Renya's words, Duo responded hotly, "You're not my keeper, Heero!  
I can take care of myself."  
  
"Apparently you can't. You told her about us, Duo. You know what that   
means."  
  
"I'm not going to let you kill her! She showed me the Gundam. She could   
have turned me over to those guys who came in there looking for us, but she   
didn't. I *trust* her!" *I would die before I let you kill her. I would   
die before I let you say these things to her, before I let you hurt her the   
way I know you would.*  
  
"You also trust *me*," he replied icily.  
  
"Are you saying I can't?"  
  
"I'm saying that I would kill you in an instant, without thought or care.   
How do you know she isn't the same way?"   
  
"Because unlike *you*, Heero, she has a soul!" With that, he stormed from   
the room without a backwards glance.  
  
"I have a soul," he murmured to the empty air, "I just can't afford to let it  
figure into my decisions."  
----------  
  
End 2 


	3. A Gray and Tattered Tutu

My Dark Life part 3  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
PG  
Whosits and Whatsits:  
Too bad I don't own GW... I'd be a happy, happy camper.  
  
Soooo... this one is a very important chapter. I worry over it heaps!! Tell  
me what you think, and I'll love you forever!!  
  
Also, I just want to go ahead and say *now* that I'm taking major liberties  
with the GW timeline, among other things. I guess it's kinda... poetic   
license? Oh well. You'll see what I mean in the next chapter more than  
this one.  
-------------  
"Now that you tear your dreams from consumptive ballerinas,  
She'll stand on tiptoe for you in a gray and tattered tutu.  
She stays where she is cause of voyeurs like these,  
With an accusative look that says, 'My dark life.'"  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
-------------  
My Dark Life part 3  
  
  
Next morning a knock on the door sent Heero shooting up from his bed, gun in   
hand. He peered through the peephole before frowning deeply and opening the   
door. "What do you want, Renya?" he demanded coldly.  
  
"What do you *think* I want?" she hissed, brushing past him and into the   
room. "Duo told me what happened last night. What problem do you have with   
me, Heero-san?"  
  
Her formality irked him for some reason, and he closed the door a bit more   
firmly than he intended. Tension caused her to start from the sound, and she  
paced nervously around the room. "I have no problem with you, except that I   
don't *know* you. You claim to want to leave OZ... why?"  
  
"Duo said he explained everything to you. OZ killed my people. Why would I   
want to fight for them?" He stared at her, and she frowned. "They're   
oppressive, Heero. They want to control the Colonies, and keep everything   
under their rule."  
  
"What is the name of the man who created you?"  
  
"What?" she asked, the sudden question confusing her momentarily. With a   
shake of her head, she said, "He's known to me only as Dr. J. Apparently he   
and - Heero, let go!" she cried as he grabbed her arm and twisted it   
painfully behind her back.  
  
"Who are you?" he demanded roughly, shoving the gun against her temple.  
  
"You're hurting me!"  
  
"Who sent you!? How do you know Dr. J?! Why would he be working for OZ!!?"  
He threw her onto the bed and she cradled her sore arm protectively.  
  
"What is wrong with you, Heero!? No one *sent* me. I know only that Dr. J   
is the man whom I've lived with all my life. He created my Gundam and he   
helped to create *me*! How do *you* know him!?"  
  
Realizing that she really hadn't known the truth, he sank down onto the bed   
next to her, head swimming. "He's the man who has been giving me orders   
since I was sent to Earth. He gives me my missions... he sent us."  
  
"Us... the Gundams," she murmured.  
  
"Hai. There are five... or so I thought. Renya, did he tell you to come to   
us? No, don't answer that... whether you lie or speak truly, I'll not   
believe you."  
  
She chewed her lower lip and reached out a tentative hand to rest on his arm.  
He flinched away so suddenly that she drew back as though he had struck her.   
"I know you don't trust me, Heero. I can't say that I blame you... no one   
sent me, but after hearing what you say about Dr. J, it makes me wonder if   
all of this wasn't some plan of his. It smacks of his doing, truly told."   
She let out a sigh and ran a small hand through her long, light brown hair.  
  
He glanced over his shoulder at her, and the look in her amber-green eyes   
gave him pause. Something, some pain he saw there, made his heart twist   
within his chest in a way he couldn't remember it ever doing. He stared at   
her with thoughtful, narrowed blue eyes, and whispered, "Why do you look so   
familiar to me, Renya?"  
  
Her eyes widened. "You feel it too! I thought I was imagining things. Ever  
since that first day I saw you, I felt like I knew you from somewhere, I felt  
like we had this *connection*."  
  
"Is it because we're both Gundam pilots?"  
  
She shook her head quickly. "I feel it not with Duo. That is... the   
connection I feel to Duo is different, more immediate. With you it's old,   
lingering... like... like a memory from a dream," she said, remembering her   
thoughts upon hearing his name for the first time.  
  
"Duo," he said almost bitterly, and the momentary chink in his armor closed   
up fast. She let out an involuntary little sigh as he turned away.  
  
"You care for him," she prompted gently.  
  
"I care for no one."  
  
"Liar," she said with a soft smile. "You do care for Duo, and for the other   
pilots as well. And you care for Relena."  
  
"Relena has nothing to do with this!" he almost snarled, jumping up from the   
bed.  
  
She followed him quickly, and this time didn't let him pull away from her   
touch. "I need you to listen to me for a moment, Heero," she said urgently.  
"Whatever connection it is you and I feel toward one another, we can't let   
anyone else know about it. It's too... ambiguous for anyone else to be able   
to understand. Hell, we don't even understand it! Do you see, Heero?"  
  
He turned slowly, blue eyes glowing with something she'd never seen before.   
"Yes, Renya," he said almost tenderly, reaching out to touch her face, but   
hesitating with hand hovering in midair, "I do see."  
  
Suddenly the door was thrown open and Duo burst in. Heero dropped his arm   
and turned away quickly, his expression changing to blank boredom in an   
instant. The braided boy stopped upon seeing Renya, and his near-violet gaze  
flicked back and forth between the two, the strange tension in the air   
evident to all. "Well, hi! You're the last person I expected to see here,"   
he said finally.  
  
She smiled wryly. "Yeah, well, I figured Heero and I needed to have a little  
talk. He still doesn't trust me, of course, but perhaps we're on our way."  
  
"The man who gives me our orders is her father," he said bluntly.  
  
"Nani!?" Duo cried. "How is that possible?"  
  
Heero and Renya shared a glance, and she shrugged. "We know not. Should we   
confront him with what we've discovered?" she asked almost rhetorically. "I   
don't think so," she answered herself. "I have no idea what would happen if   
he found out I knew about you... or that you knew about me."  
  
Heero frowned slightly. "We'll do nothing until our next set of orders comes  
in."  
  
"Will I be included?" Renya asked quietly.  
  
He stared at her with a carefully assessing gaze for a moment. "Yes."  
  
Her victory won, she bowed her head slightly and moved to the door. "Good.   
Now I've got to get home before sensei begins to wonder where I am. Good   
day, gentlemen."  
  
"I'll walk you out," Duo said, following her into the hall. "What was that   
about?" he asked after a moment.  
  
"What was what about?"  
  
"Is there something going on between you and Heero?" he asked incredulously.  
"You aren't gonna go all gaga over him like Relena, are you?"  
  
She smiled slightly. "I don't go 'gaga' over people, Duo."  
  
"Oh," he said, his voice small.  
  
She reached out a hand to stop him. "Going gaga would be undignified. I try  
to do nothing that would be undignified."  
  
"Oh," he repeated, staring down at his black boots.  
  
Lifting his chin with a gentle hand, she smiled softly. "That doesn't mean I  
don't do things that might be impulsive or even... whimsical," she said.   
"And it doesn't mean I don't feel."   
  
"*What* do you feel?" he asked breathlessly, catching her hand in his.  
  
A wretched sadness erupted in her pretty face, and she pulled away quickly.   
"Don't ask me that! Please, Duo, don't make me choose!" she whispered almost  
inaudibly. Before he could reply to this, she was gone, off at a run down   
the hall and out of the building.  
  
"What the...?" he demanded of the empty air.  
  
"Interesting girl," Heero remarked from behind him.  
  
"What did you say to her?!" Duo demanded, turning on his friend with an angry  
growl. "Yesterday she was fine, and now suddenly she won't even look at me!  
What was happening when I walked in!?"  
  
Heero stared at him with a blank face. "Nothing was happening, Duo," he said  
without expression. "It's not my fault you're having trouble with Renya; I   
couldn't care less about the whole damn thing. We have work to do."  
  
His cobalt eyes flashed dangerously. "At times like this, Yuy, I feel that I  
could really, truly kill you."  
  
Heero's gaze was unflinching, and his voice colder than ice. "I'd like to   
see you try."  
  
---------  
"I hate him!" Renya Calnar whispered furiously, wiping at the tears that   
threatened to spill down her cheeks. "I hate him, I hate him, I hate him!"   
She honestly had no idea to whom she was referring: Heero, Duo, her sensei,   
Zechs Merquise, Treize Khushrenada, the Gods... whom could she blame for what  
was churning inside of her? Whom could she pinpoint as being responsible for  
the roller-coaster ride her emotions had been on for the past week? Pain and  
anguish mingled with a deep, sweet joy seemed to fill her at every moment...   
except now. Now all she felt was bitterness and contempt for him -   
whichever one of them it was - who had taken from her all she knew and held   
dear.   
  
She had been created to fight for OZ. It was something she had accepted   
without question... until the day she learned the truth about her people.   
Her world had been thrown upside down, but still she kept it inside, fought   
against it. She was a soldier. "Ours is not to question why; ours is but to  
do and die!" It had been her philosophy for all sixteen years of her short   
life.  
  
And then Heero Yuy and Duo Maxwell passed her in the hallway at school. A   
pair of icy blue eyes set in a familiar-yet-unfamiliar face had thrown her   
into such tail-spins of confusion that she had revealed her two greatest   
secrets to a near stranger. Now security had been compromised; if Dr. J ever  
found out, surely the two young pilots would be disposed of. God only knew   
what would be done with her; were she not the greatest... invention?   
discovery? breakthrough? science project?... of modern times, she, too,   
would be killed without hesitation.  
  
So what to do? Run? No... sensei would find her, or OZ. Treize-sama would   
most surely send Zechs-san after her if she disappeared, and Zechs always got  
his man.   
  
*Oh, Zechs...* her mind murmured sadly. She had been half in love with him   
for as long as she could remember, but now the feeling seemed like the   
lingering of a sweet, forgotten dream. In the past week she had gone from   
dutiful soldier to traitor, and her love for Zechs had evaporated with the   
rest of her silly, fanciful childhood notions.  
  
Now she wasn't even sure she knew what love was. She remembered the kiss   
between she and Duo the day before, how soft and loving his lips had felt   
pressed against hers, how his hands had run through her hair, how his spicy,   
comforting smell had enveloped her, how a deep and abiding warmth had filled  
her through and through. Was that love? She had told him the truth about   
her life, and he hadn't turned away from her. Agony ripped through her, and   
suddenly her mind resumed its earlier litany: "I hate him, I hate him, I hate  
him!"  
  
*No, what I really hate is feeling so helpless and confused. I hate not   
knowing... I hate being lost. Who is Duo Maxwell? Who is Heero Yuy? For   
that matter, who am *I*? Why do I feel this strange connection to Heero? I   
thought it was just my imagination, but he feels it too! Maybe it's because   
he was trained by my sensei, and I recognize in him something Dr. J tries to   
produce in all his students: ruthlessness.*   
  
She dismissed that thought almost as soon as it surfaced. Regardless of   
where the connection had come from, it was there, and it was just something   
they were both going to have to deal with. A shiver went through her as a   
dark cloud passed over the sun and the day cooled considerably. "Oh Gods,"   
she murmured fervently, staring at the brilliant red of her door, "please let  
this whole mess work out. Please help me. Please help me!"  
  
He was there the moment she opened the door, a frown cutting a deep path   
across his face. "Where have you been, Renya?" he demanded sharply.  
  
"At school, sensei," she responded carefully.  
  
"On a Saturday? Not even you are that devoted to your studies."  
  
"I was visiting a friend, sensei. I have a project due on Monday, and we   
were working on it together."  
  
"This friend of yours wouldn't happen to be about so tall and wear his long   
brown hair in a braid, would he?" he asked mockingly.  
  
"What are you implying?" she said, her tone edged with something he had never  
heard from her before.  
  
He cocked an eyebrow and stared at her with measuring eyes. "I'm implying   
nothing, Renya. I simply know that you are an impressionable young girl.   
What do you know about this boy?"  
  
"Nothing, sensei," she said hollowly. "I know absolutely nothing."  
  
"Now, now, little one, I can't possibly believe the truth in that!" a voice   
said as a tall, handsome man emerged from the back room, flanked on one side   
by another man, this one more beautiful than handsome (though a mask covered   
half his face, Renya had known him long before he began wearing the infernal   
thing), with long, platinum hair.  
  
Her eyes widened and she bowed respectfully. "Treize-sama, Zechs-san!" she   
murmured quickly. "I had no idea you would be visiting today. Had I known-"  
  
"We decided to surprise you," Treize interrupted smoothly. "The good doctor   
here has told us wonderful things of your progress. With the emergence of   
these Gundams as a definite threat to OZ, we were hoping you were ready to   
join the battle." Her astonishment caused him to smile fondly. He had   
always felt a deep affection - that of an uncle for his favorite niece - for   
this pretty little genetic prodigy. It was good that they had come. She was  
ready, and it was better to get her now, before her skills began to grow   
stale.  
  
She stared at him, astounded, and then glanced at Zechs. He nodded in   
acknowledgment, but she could not read his expression due to that damn mask.  
"I know not what to say, my lord. Thank you!" Inside she was a mess: how in  
the world could she get word to Duo and Heero about this? Oh Gods, Heero   
would *never* trust her now!!  
  
Dr. J nodded approvingly. "Yes, my dear, it's time to take your rightful   
place," he said quietly, but she recognized something strange in his voice.   
Was it resignation? Disappointment? What in the world was he planning!?   
  
"We have brought the Tallgeese for you to try, Renya-san," Zechs was saying  
politely. *She has changed,* some distant part of his mind noted. *She is   
a woman now, despite her young age. When did that happen?*   
  
His words barely registered in her frayed mind, but when they did she   
frowned, both from the suggestion and this new, strange formality. "The   
Tallgeese? Sir, don't you know I have a Gundam of my own? The Tallgeese is   
a prototype... and besides, isn't it *your* suit, Zechs-san?" He wanted to   
play at being strangers? No problem.  
  
"Indeed, my dear, but the Tallgeese was designed for you to pilot," Treize   
said.  
  
"Or, more accurately, *you* were designed for *it*," Dr. J interjected.  
  
She bit her lower lip, torn. She could not be rude to these men, but never   
would she give up Bright Claw. "With all due respect, Treize-sama, sensei   
and I designed Bright Claw. She is my Gundam, my machine. I cannot possibly  
learn to pilot a new suit - one not even a Gundam, though I mean no   
disrespect to the Tallgeese - so suddenly."  
  
"My lord," Zechs spoke up, "I believe she is right in this case. Perhaps it   
is best to fight a Gundam with a Gundam, ne?"  
  
"Truly told!" she said in relief. Trust Zechs to intervene on her behalf...   
though, considering his connection with the suit in question, perhaps it was   
his *own* behalf. "From what I've heard of the Gundams, my lord, we will   
need every advantage."  
  
After a moment he nodded. "Very well, I will trust you both. Tomorrow   
morning I will be sending Lady Une with a shuttle to fetch you. Be ready."  
  
Tomorrow morning?! "Yes, my lord," she said, inclining her head   
respectfully. Goodbyes were exchanged all around, and the two men swept from  
the little house with a promise to return soon.  
  
"Good Gods, tomorrow morning?!" Dr. J said irritably once they were gone.   
"We haven't much time, child. Call those two Gundam pilots over here and   
let's get this ball rolling."  
  
"Gundam pilots?" she demanded, gaping at him.  
  
"Duo Maxwell and Heero Yuy, child! Surely you know who they truly are! You   
showed the one Bright Claw, did you not? Don't stare at me so! Do you think  
I'm a fool? Of course I recognized them. I wanted you to show them your   
Gundam. You'll be fighting with them when the time comes, but not if OZ gets  
to you first! Now go, girl, before that infernal fool returns!!"  
  
She went.  
-------------  
  
End 3 


	4. And Robber Men Await You...

My Dark Life part 4  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
PG  
Disclaimers and the like:  
Nope, not mine... but don't steal Renya or Bright Claw!!  
  
The vague Mallrats reference is for Joe. Snootchie Bootchies indeed.  
  
The Twinkies are for Mickey, who loves them... I hate them, but   
they're funnier than cupcakes. And, after all, nothing is truly   
complete without a little wholesome, creamy goodness.  
  
The Northern Exposure reference is for Kevin. He always loved Shelley,  
and we were very successful in retraining Mickey to talk like her.  
"Preggers," btw, means "pregnant."  
  
The humor is for me. I was getting sick of all the angst.  
  
And all of it, my dear readers, is for you. Enjoy.  
-----------------  
"And robber men await you then in each beguiling alley  
To shake you and to pierce you and to remind you of   
My dark life."  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
------------------  
My Dark Life part 4  
  
  
"Renya?!" Duo demanded, shocked, upon opening the door and finding her on the  
other side with wide, frantic eyes and long, golden brown hair windblown.   
"What are you doing here?"  
  
"No time to talk! We've got to go, all three of us."  
  
"Go where?" Heero asked.  
  
"To sensei... he knows everything!"  
  
"What?!"  
  
"I didn't tell him, I promise!" she cried at Duo's outburst and the sudden   
murderous gleam in Heero's eyes. She pushed past the braided boy and closed   
the door behind her. "Treize Khushranada and Zechs Marquise showed up at our  
house today. I'm to report for duty tomorrow morning... Treize is sending   
Lady Une with a shuttle!"  
  
"Tomorrow morning? Why so suddenly?"  
  
"Because of the Gundams. Apparently I'm needed. When they left, sensei told  
me to come get you. He said I would be fighting with you, not with OZ! He   
knows I showed you Bright Claw, Duo, and he knows who you both are."  
  
"How?" Heero hissed.  
  
"I don't know! He said he recognized you. Please, Heero, you must believe   
me! This isn't a trap."  
  
"Why should we, Renya?" Duo demanded. "You admit that Treize and Zechs are   
here. How do we know you aren't leading us straight to them?"  
  
"They left!" she cried wildly.  
  
"How do you know? What if Dr. J is the one setting the trap for all three of  
us?" Heero suggested.  
  
"He wouldn't-" She stopped suddenly and let out a puff of breath, realizing   
that he very well *might*. While it was true her sensei had never been   
especially kind or loving towards her, he was the closet thing she had to a   
father, and she just had trouble believing he would use her so vilely. She   
bit her lower lip nearly hard enough to draw blood and tried to ignore the   
little inner voice that whispered, *It is amazing what a man will do in order  
to preserve his own life.* Just then she caught sight of Heero's gun on a   
nearby table and grabbed it, holding it out to him. "If it's a trap,   
regardless of who's behind it, you can kill me. I give you my word."   
*Don't make me regret this, sensei!!*  
  
Her *word*. Why should that matter either way to him? People broke promises  
all the time... why should the word of this girl be any different? It could  
still be a trap. It could be anything. He stared at her with dark,   
suspicious blue eyes, ignoring Duo's squeak of protest as he took the weapon   
from her, and nodded slowly. "Let's go."  
  
They were half way across the school's front lawn when a loud, high-pitched   
voice caught their attention. "Ohhhh, Renya-chan!" a girl cried, waving her   
hand and running toward them. "Where are *you* off to?" she asked with a   
pointed glance at the two boys.  
  
"Nowhere, Mieko-chan," she responded, trying to sound as natural as possible.  
"We were going to study for the English test on Monday. Duo-kun is American,  
so we figured he'd be the best source for knowledge of the English language."  
  
Mieko pouted. "And you didn't invite *me*? You know I'm failing English!"  
  
A dark brow flicked upward in amusement. "I know the reason you're failing   
English is because you hate to study. You honestly want to spend such a   
beautiful Saturday indoors? *Studying*?"  
  
The other girl's smile was saccharine as she stared at Duo, completely   
ignoring Renya's comment. "Anything Duo-kun wants to teach, *I* want to   
learn!"  
  
Suddenly Heero stepped between the two, his glare deadly. "Go *away*," he   
hissed harshly. "We don't *want* you here."  
  
Mieko stepped back, wounded. "G-gomen nasai!" she whispered, face pale. "I   
didn't mean to intrude. I'll leave!"  
  
"Mieko-chan, matte!" Renya cried, glaring daggers of her own at Heero.   
"Please don't pay any attention to him!" But the other girl was gone, and   
Renya hadn't missed the tears she had struggled vainly to contain. "That was  
completely unnecessary!" she snapped at him.  
  
He shrugged. "It got rid of her, didn't it?"  
  
A dangerous light flared in her eyes, but she turned away quickly. "Come on.  
We're wasting time."  
  
"Ya know, Heero, you could lighten up a little. I think fighting our way out  
of a trap would be kinda fun, don't you?" Duo said with a grin.  
  
"No."  
  
"Aw, come on! I can see it now: Treize and Zechs versus Heero and Duo! Bap!  
Bang! Boom! Thwap! Snicky, snicky snorn!" He danced back and forth across  
the sidewalk, a punch at the empty air marking each comic-book style sound   
effect. "Oof!" he suddenly gasped.  
  
Renya glanced over her shoulder, wondering why a punch would make an "oof,"   
to be greeted with the sight of Duo doubled over holding his stomach.   
"Heero!" she chastised.  
  
He shot her a satisfied grin - or the closest thing he ever got to a grin,   
anyway. "It's the fastest way to shut him up."   
  
"Don't worry, Renya," he said in a strained voice with an equally strained   
smile, "it didn't hurt a bit."  
  
She shook her head wonderingly, trying to hide her amusement, and decided to   
leave the two to their own devices. They had discovered, somehow, a way to   
coexist more-or-less peacefully despite their many glaring differences. Who   
was she to mess with rapport like that?  
  
"Do you really think Dr. J would betray us to OZ?" Duo asked suddenly, his   
voice filled with uncharacteristic worry and gloom.  
  
Renya shrugged a shoulder. "I don't know. I hope not. My life's on the   
line, ne?" She tried to sound carefree, but failed miserably.  
  
"You must trust him at least a little bit. Or has your life so little value   
to you?" Heero asked.  
  
She glanced back at him quickly. "The question is, Heero-san, how much value  
does my life have to *you*? Would you truly kill me if this turns out to be   
a trap? What would be the point? I would be trapped just as surely as you."  
  
"I would kill us all, Renya-san," he said, answering her bothersome formality  
with a dose of his own. "We know too much to be safe in the hands of OZ."  
  
"And Dr. J? Would you kill him as well?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Renya and Duo shared an apprehensive glance, neither doubting his word for an  
instant. "Well then, we'll just have to hope it isn't a trap!" Duo said with  
a grin, shoving his hands deep within his pockets and whistling merrily.   
  
*Irrepressible, that one,* she thought with a fond smile. But then her   
amber-green gaze moved to the other boy, and the smile faded as though it had  
never been as a deep sense of worry filled her.  
  
---------  
"At last! Good Gods, girl, how long does it take to walk back and forth from  
that infernal school of yours!?" Dr. J cried as the three stepped through the  
red door and into the small house.  
  
"It took a bit of convincing to get them to come with me, sensei. You had to  
know that it would."  
  
"Indeed," he replied. Then, "Well, no matter; we're wasting time! Heero Yuy  
and Duo Maxwell... my, my, I am glad you chose *now* to show up in our little  
village!"  
  
"Why are you working with OZ?" Heero demanded, voice strengthened with ice   
and steel.  
  
"Not *with*, my boy, *against*. It was simply in the best interest of myself  
and my little... well, *project* here that I pretend to be an ally. It was   
never my intention that she use her considerable skills for OZ."  
  
Renya's teeth gritted at the "p" word, and Duo frowned deeply. "Look, doc, I  
know you consider yourself some bigwig because you created Renya, but she's a  
*person*. Maybe you should remember that."  
  
He stared at the braided boy, and then looked at her quickly; though she   
couldn't see his eyes, she could tell he blinked several times. "Yes, of   
course she's a person... a person *I*, as you so nicely pointed out, created.  
How could I forget?"  
  
Recognizing the growl starting in the base of his throat, Renya laid a   
restraining hand on Duo's arm. "It's all right," she said softly. "I'm used  
to it."  
  
"That doesn't make it ok," he hissed as the totally oblivious Dr. J continued  
to prattle on and on about what he intended to use his favorite creation for.  
  
"Now, Heero, I understand that you don't trust any of us, and that's   
perfectly all right. Frankly, I don't care who and what you trust. However,  
as part of your new orders, Renya and Bright Claw will now be fighting with   
you."  
  
His eyes narrowed, but he nodded solemnly.  
  
"Good! I knew you would begin thinking sensibly once I got a chance to talk   
to you." He had been fiddling with something, a small machine of some sort,   
and suddenly he let out a triumphant cry. "Got it! Here you are," he said,   
handing the object to Heero, who looked at it as though it was a snake about   
to strike.  
  
"What is it?" he asked at last.  
  
"It was your favorite toy as a child. Press that button."  
  
He did, and a large hologram suddenly shimmered to life before them. It was   
a picture of two children, a boy with dark brown hair and dark, dubious blue   
eyes standing next to a pretty girl with lighter hair and bright, slightly   
slanted green eyes. The two had their arms around each other, and despite   
the wariness of the boy's gaze, both were smiling brightly. They were such   
lovely, happy children that Renya felt her heart catch a moment before   
recognition surged through her. "Why, that's me!" she cried in surprise.  
  
"And I," Heero murmured almost doubtfully.  
  
"Of course it is, you silly fools. Remember you nothing?"  
  
"Sensei," Renya began hesitantly.  
  
"What does this mean?!" Heero demanded before she could continue.  
  
"Then you really *don't* remember! Astonishing! I thought surely... well,  
I suppose it *was* long ago... and then Heero left to be raised by that Odin   
fool... dear me. Oh well, no matter." He turned away and began cleaning up   
his workspace before Heero grabbed him and spun him around.  
  
"Explain this!" he said. "Explain this *now*!"  
  
Dr. J's smirk infuriated Renya, but still she pressed her palm against Heero's   
back as he hefted the old man into the air. "Don't hurt him, Heero, please.  
He can't explain anything if you keep choking him like that!"  
  
The boy eased his grip somewhat, but he didn't put the man down. "Tell me   
what I want to know," he said dangerously.  
  
"Don't try to intimidate me, boy! I gave you that strength you have, just as  
I gave Renya her very life! You want to know what that picture means? Very   
well, I'll tell you! Just remember that you *asked*, that you practically   
killed me to get the information!" he gasped angrily.  
  
"Just answer the question, sensei!" she demanded, frightened.  
  
"That picture is one taken of you, Renya, and you, Heero, when you were very   
young children. The reason you knew one another so young is because you have  
the same mother!"  
  
Heero stepped back, shocked to the core, and the old man tumbled   
unceremoniously to the floor. "You lie," he hissed.  
  
"I do not," he said with simple dignity, rising to his feet.  
  
"I have no mother!" Renya cried. "I'm your *creation*, remember?!"  
  
"Where do you think I got your human genetic material from, hmm?! A young   
woman showed up on my doorstep with a small child... I took them both in.   
The woman died not long after, but it is, in large part, her genetic code I   
combined with that from the Cal'sha to create you."  
  
She felt as though he had punched her in the stomach. Heero... her brother?!  
Good Gods! Sudden anger seized her, anger at having never known her mother,   
her father... her brother... her people!! With a feral cry, she threw   
herself at the doctor and punched him hard across the face; not a slap, or a   
lady-like "oh-I-might-break-a-nail" tap, but a strong, vicious punch with   
most of her super-human strength behind it.  
  
The goggle-like glasses he wore went flying, and blood spurted from his nose   
in a red gush. She pulled away in horror, terribly ashamed by her violent,   
rash action, and stared down at her small hand balled into a tight, dangerous  
fist. Her jaw falling open ever so slightly and her breath coming in   
strained gasps, she deliberately straightened each finger until the hand was   
held out flat before her, palm up, so that all could see the bloody   
crescent-moons her fingernails had created. Her eyes moved to Dr. J, then   
Heero, then Duo, then back to Heero. Something in his dark blue gaze pierced  
her heart so deeply that she felt it as a physical pain, and, with something   
like a sob, she turned and fled from the room.  
  
"Renya!" Duo cried, giving chase.  
  
Heero started to follow, but the doctor held up a hand to stop him. "No,   
boy, let them go. He alone can perhaps sooth her hurts now. He was right to  
chastise me for not treating the girl as though she was a person. Sometimes   
I forget these things, seeing her only in terms of genetic code laid out like  
building blocks."  
  
"Is that how you see me?" Heero asked after a moment, offering him a tissue   
from a nearby box.  
  
"Yes. No, not wholly," he said on second thought. "You are also a soldier   
to me. So is Renya, to a certain extent, but I only enhanced you   
genetically, while she I built from scratch."  
  
"*Built*," he quoted with a strange resentment rising within him.  
  
Dr. J glanced over at him warily. "Yes, you always were quite protective of   
her. The attachment the two of you shared was becoming a problem. I didn't   
want it to interfere with your destinies, so I sent you away."  
  
"Why me?"  
  
He shrugged. "Renya was mine."  
  
"I think," Heero said, eyes wandering to the doorway out which the girl and   
Duo had gone, "that she isn't *yours* any longer." *And better for it,* some  
deeply hidden part of him thought with satisfaction.  
  
--------  
~Brother. Brother! Brother!?~ The word repeated itself over and over   
inside her head like some strange, misplaced echo. Why was this news   
affecting her so strangely? Shouldn't she be happy to discover actual   
*family*? She who had never had anyone... she who had always been alone and   
lonely... now she had a brother. A brother and-   
  
"Renya!" a voice cried, cutting in on her thoughts.  
  
*A brother and *Duo*,* she thought with the barest trace of a smile. She   
wiped hastily at the tears flowing down her cheeks, but he noticed them   
anyway.  
  
He stopped short at the sight of her tears, and a nervous hand went behind   
his head. "It's ok if you want to cry, Ren," he said after a moment. "I   
think I'd probably want to cry, too, if I'd just discovered that an ol'   
sourpuss like Heero was my brother!"  
  
The terrible agony that suddenly contorted her features made him realize how   
truly out of place his attempts at joking were. "Oh, Renya-chan," he   
murmured, catching her up in his arms despite her feeble attempts to push him  
away, "I'm sorry, please forgive me. You can't listen to a word I say, Ren,   
honestly! I just... I joke around and say silly things because I can't bear   
to see people I care about hurting."  
  
"You can't bear to see *yourself* hurting," she said in a resentful voice   
muffled by his black shirtfront.  
  
"Heh... guess you got me there," he agreed, hands stroking through her long   
hair idly. "Talk to me, Renya, please," he said, his voice suddenly serious.  
  
"What's there to talk about?" she murmured with a sniff. "Heero's my   
brother. He never told me about any family... he never mentioned   
*anything*!" she cried, and he held tighter.  
  
"What will you do?" he asked after a moment.  
  
"What is there *to* do?" she demanded, thrusting away from him at last.   
"He's right: I was created to be a Gundam pilot. What else do I know? What   
else can I do? I'll fight against OZ, but not because he tells me to. I'll   
fight against OZ because they killed my people. I'll fight against OZ   
because it's that very fight that took my brother away from me... and brought  
him back again." The bitterness in her smile cut him to the quick as she   
said, "I am, as always, a slave to my genetic code... and he who created it."  
  
"Nai, Renya, not a slave. You wanted to fight before this, right? Why   
should that desire change because of Heero?"  
  
"Not *just* because of Heero," she said softly, not meeting his intense,   
cobalt gaze.  
  
"Who else?" he asked, breathless.  
  
"You, baka," she said, her lips twisting wryly.  
  
"Oh... well... then why should your desire to fight change because of Heero   
and *I*?" he rephrased with a small smile.  
  
"Because now," she replied, her eyes flicking upward to meet his at last, "I   
have something to live for."  
  
A tiny smile graced his features, and she let her tears fall at last. He   
held her as she sobbed, and some part of him was grateful to feel his own   
eyes growing moist.  
  
--------------  
After crying herself dry - and Duo rather damp - Renya wearily climbed the   
stairs to her bedroom, leaving the braided boy to raid the kitchen in search   
of food. As she opened the door, she stopped short, the sight that met her   
eyes a total surprise. "Heero?"  
  
He turned away from the window quickly, his expression guarded. "I'm sorry.  
Dr. J said-"  
  
"No, it's ok," she interrupted quickly. "You just surprised me, that's all."  
  
He cleared his throat and stared down at his feet a moment. "So..." he began  
warily.  
  
She smiled ruefully. "Yeah. I guess it solves the mystery of why we look   
so familiar to one another, ne?"  
  
"Uh huh," he said quietly, glancing up at last. The signs of weeping in her   
face caused a feeling of unexpected tenderness to rise within him, and he   
tried frantically to quell it. "Are you ok?" he finally managed. It was the   
closest he would let himself get to comforting her - or himself.  
  
She shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. You?"  
  
"Fine," he replied before he could stop himself. Internally he sighed - he   
wanted to accept what she was offering with the simply worded question, but   
he couldn't. He was a soldier, a killing machine... and so was she. So how   
did she turn out so damn different than he had?   
  
A silence took residence between them, and they seemed loath to break it.   
The idea of being family was too new, too strange to the both of them.   
Finally, with a little sigh, she said, "When do we leave?"  
  
A grateful flash went through his dark blue eyes. "Tonight. He wants us to   
be out of here before Colonel Une shows up in the morning."  
  
"Naturally," she agreed. "I should go tell Duo. He's... eating, I think."  
  
"Oh, well, get comfortable. He'll be at it a while, and if you want   
something you might want to salvage it now," he said, something resembling a   
smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.  
  
"If I didn't know better, Heero Yuy, I might think that was a *joke*!"  
  
His face turned to stone again. "A joke? I doubt it."  
  
And for the first time in what seemed like ages, Renya Calnar found herself   
laughing with true abandon... and Heero Yuy managed what even the most jaded   
of cynics would call a grin.  
  
"I gotta be imagining things! Renya, has this milk gone bad?!" an astonished  
Duo demanded from the doorway.   
  
Still chuckling, she shook her head. "No, Duo, you aren't hallucinating. I  
guess tension has finally made us both crack!"  
  
"Bring anything good?" Heero asked, pulling himself together in an instant.  
  
"I got popcorn, peanut butter, pickles, milk, ice cream and... oh, my   
favorite! Twinkies!!" he cried triumphantly, holding forth the food like   
offerings to a temple.  
  
"Duo..." Renya said, wrinkling her nose at the strange assortment, "I just   
gotta ask one thing. Are you preggers?!"  
  
"Haha, genius," he replied, throwing a piece of popcorn at her. "In case you  
hadn't noticed, your kitchen leaves much to be desired."  
  
"Yeah, if you're *normal*," Heero spoke up.  
  
"You're one to talk about being normal, psycho boy. Just be glad I brought   
you anything!" He tossed a bag of beef jerky at the other boy's head, and   
Renya frowned as he caught it.  
  
"Where in the world did you get *that*?! Hell, Duo, I think you got the wrong   
kitchen!! Did you happen to accidentally wander next door?"  
  
"I think there's more to Dr. J than we at first thought," Heero remarked,   
staring at the plastic bag in his hand as though it contained the deadliest   
of poisons.  
  
"He sure does like his Twinkies," the braided boy said, taking a huge bite of  
a yellow cake and chewing with a look of bliss plastered on his face. "I   
found a whole stash in the cabinet!" he managed to say around a mouth full of  
creamy filling and nuclear-warfare-surviving cake.  
  
"Who's been into my TWINKIES!?!" a voice suddenly screamed from below.  
  
Swallowing hard, Duo dove under the bed, box of snack cakes stuffed under his  
arm as he gripped the remaining bite of Twinkie as though his very life   
depended on it. Heero and Renya shared an amused glance as they headed   
downstairs to calm the angry scientist.  
  
"I've always wondered just what's in those things," Renya remarked.  
  
"Don't ask."  
  
"Wholesome, creamy goodness!" a muffled voice cried from under the bed.  
--------------  
  
End 4 


	5. Enter the Pious Elite

My Dark Life part 5  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
PG  
Notes, Disclaimers, etc:  
How many different ways can one say the same thing? I don't own Gundam Wing!  
I do own Renya Calnar, Bright Claw and the Cal'sha.  
  
And we're back to angst. Also, this is probably my least favorite part so   
far. Forgive me!! I really wanted it to be better, but I just can't wrap   
my brain around it. What I have planned for 6 should be *heaps* better.   
  
C&C me!!  
------------  
"Enter the pious elite  
In their preening finery,  
And bang the tambourine.  
They're dining on rice paper scenery.  
See how the villain attracts envious glances from everyone?  
She's waitressing by day;  
It doesn't bring in much money now."  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
------------  
My Dark Life part 5  
  
  
Duo Maxwell stared down at the girl's sleeping form and let out a little   
sigh. She looked so young, lying there asleep... a young, innocent   
woman-child - or perhaps simply one whose actions were justified far beyond   
the bounds of mere guilt or innocence. But no... surely with Renya it was   
the former. She hadn't lived an easy life, of course, but she had never   
killed, nor had she ever seen death. That would all be changing soon; she   
would use her Gundam for more than just sims, and all the training she had   
done with her sensei would finally come to use.   
  
At the thought of Renya's (former) sensei, Duo's mind wandered to Heero,   
supposedly this girl's brother. Some part of him boggled at that. They were  
both products of Dr. J, so how had the one turned out so completely different  
from the other? What had happened to Heero that buried his humanity so deep   
within him that it might never be recovered? Perhaps... perhaps some of   
Renya's light and life could restore Heero's... and even Duo's own, for   
despite his cheerful exterior, he felt cold and dead inside, as hollow as a   
dried-out husk.  
  
He frowned deeply, hating himself - and Heero and Dr. J and the other pilots   
and OZ - for stealing her innocence away from her. She had been raised as a   
soldier, trained to fight and to kill, but until one actually commits such   
acts, one is clean and... and... able to sleep. He shuddered, remembering   
some of his own nightmares, and sent up a quick, silent prayer that she would  
be spared such horrors.  
  
He didn't want to wake her. He didn't want her to have to face this day and   
all the changes it would bring. She would meet the other three, and perhaps   
Dr. J would get it into his fool head to send them on a mission... a mission   
against the organization to which she had once sworn loyalty. He knew it   
wasn't a matter of betrayal; Renya hated OZ; but she didn't hate Treize, and   
she most certainly didn't hate Zechs. Those bonds of emotional loyalty could  
be far stronger than any taken with one's hand on a Bible.  
  
The shuttle shuddered beneath him as it docked with the colony, and he sighed  
again, realizing that time had run out for sweet sleep and pretty dreams.   
"Renya," the braided boy said softly, pressing a hand against the sleeping   
girl's shoulder. "Ren, wake up. We're here."  
  
She shifted and opened one eye. "Duo?" she asked, sleep and confusion making  
her voice thick. "Go 'way. Sleepin'."  
  
"No, no... come on, babe, you gotta get up!"  
  
She growled low in her throat and sat up too quickly, hitting her head on the  
bunk above her. "Ow! Don't call me 'babe,'" she said, rubbing her sore   
head.  
  
"It worked, didn't it?" he asked, amusement brightening his voice and eyes.  
  
She shot him a glare worthy of Heero and slid off the bed. "It worked, yes,   
but if you ever do it again, the consequences will far outweigh the results."  
  
He paled and swallowed hard before turning away quickly. "Well, then, I'll   
have to remember that! Ah... Heero wanted me to come in here and wake you up  
because we're about to dock... that is, we *were* about to dock when he sent   
me in here, but now we have. Docked, that is."  
  
"Wow... I've never been to a Colony before," she said wonderingly, ignoring   
his ramblings as she rushed to the little window and peered out excitedly.   
"Will I get to meet the other pilots?"  
  
He shrugged, coming up behind her. "That's the plan anyway. Dr. J   
said he was gonna try to round everyone up."  
  
Her jaw hardened at the mention of the name. "Indeed," she replied stonily.   
"Well, if anyone can do it, I'm sure *he* can. Look at his track record so   
far," she said, turning to face him with bitterness darkening her eyes.  
  
"Renya-"  
  
She shook her head quickly, silencing him. "I don't want to hear it,   
whatever it is. He's no longer my sensei, no longer someone I fear... he's   
just a weak old man with more brains than sense, and with a lack of morals   
that's astounding."   
  
Knowing that now was not the time to mess with her, he nodded agreement and   
said, "Let's go. Heero gets pissy when you make him wait."  
  
"Then by all means..." she said with a grin, quickly twisting her long hair   
up into a ponytail and grabbing her bag.  
  
As the door opened, they both stopped in surprise at the sight of Heero   
leaning casually against the opposite wall, arms crossed over his chest. "I   
thought you were gonna wait on the bridge," Duo said.  
  
He shrugged. "I was. I figured I could save some time by coming down here."  
  
"You two do realize that I *can* manage to walk around this big, scary colony  
all by myself, don't you?" Renya said dryly.  
  
"I'm sure you can, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you."  
  
"You *still* don't trust me?" she said wonderingly.  
  
"No."  
  
"Don't feel bad, Ren; Heero doesn't trust anyone. Hey, do you think we could  
meet the others at a restaurant? I'm starving!" Duo declared, jumping onto   
the train with an enthusiasm only he could muster.  
  
"They'll be meeting us at the hotel in an hour," he replied.  
  
"An hour?! That's not enough time to eat!!" he wailed pitifully, earning   
himself a dire glare from Heero. The braided pilot spoke not another word   
for the rest of the trip to the hotel, but instead kept his mouth clamped so  
tightly shut that his lips turned a strained white.  
  
Renya ignored them both, staring out the window in fascination at the world   
that whizzed by. The colony looked similar to Earth, but it *felt*   
different. The ground seemed harder, the colors not as brilliant... and the   
air smelled strange. How did people manage to live their entire lives in   
this fake world, this facsimile of nature? She frowned deeply, suddenly   
homesick, and sat back from the window.  
  
"Quite a difference, isn't it?" Heero remarked quietly, noticing the sudden   
pinched look on her face.  
  
She nodded slowly. Suddenly curious, she asked, "Where's your home, Heero?"  
  
He turned his head to stare out the window she had just moved away from   
before replying, "Not here."  
  
Sensing a deep, lonely sadness within him, but acutely aware of Duo's   
presence, Renya said nothing. ~Oh, Heero,~ she thought sorrowfully, ~what   
can I do to help you? What can I do to heal the pain you carry in your   
heart?~ She shook her head and realized that maybe he didn't *want* to be   
healed, that perhaps he was content with burying his pain so deep inside   
that no one could reach it.  
  
"This looks like the place!" the braided boy said, breaking his self-imposed   
silence at last. "Come on, minna, we have a little bit of time before the   
others show up!"  
  
"I'm not hungry," Heero said. "You two go on ahead. Be at room six-eleven   
in thirty minutes. *Thirty* *minutes*, Duo!" he repeated sternly as they   
stepped off the train.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, I gotcha! Don't get your panties in a bunch!" With that he   
grabbed Renya's hand and fairly dragged her to the hotel's coffee shop.   
"That Heero!" he said once they were seated. "Sometimes I really worry about  
him, ya know?!"  
  
"Duo, how much do you know about him?" she asked, trying to keep her voice   
casual though she was desperate to learn more about her supposed brother.  
  
"Less than I know about you," he replied with a pointed glance at the cuff   
once again wrapped around her left wrist, "but more right now than I knew   
twenty-four hours ago."  
  
"Mmmm," she agreed ruefully.  
  
"I'm sure Dr. J could tell you more than I could," he offered tentatively.  
  
"Why would *he* tell me anything?!"   
  
He shrugged and leaned back in the booth. "I don't know, but it's worth a   
try. He finally admitted the truth about you two, didn't he?"  
  
"After Heero nearly killed him!" She frowned, worrying at her full lower lip  
with her teeth. "I just don't know what to think about anything anymore,   
Duo," she said at last, her voice small and said.  
  
"Hey," he said softly, reaching across the table to brush a lock of hair away  
from her face, "look at me." She did, albeit rather reluctantly. "I'll tell  
you one thing you can always count on, Renya-chan: no matter what happens,   
I'll *always* be here for you. I don't care if you turn out to be the sister  
of the entire OZ army!! You know what they say, right? 'Come Hell or high   
water.' Well, there ya go: that's me, by your side come Hell or high   
water!!"  
  
She smiled in spite of herself, and Duo managed to once again pull her away   
from the precipice of fear and uncertainty. "Thanks, Duo-chan," she murmured  
softly. "I really needed that."  
  
"Yeah," he replied rather smugly, "I know."  
  
Renya laughed and threw a sugar packet at him. "Baka!"  
  
"Guilty as charged," he admitted unabashedly.  
  
------------  
Twenty minutes later (by Renya's watch, which was apparently a little off   
based on the look on Heero's face when he opened the door), Renya and Duo   
stood before room six-eleven. She knocked, Heero answered and Duo burst past  
him and into the bright, airy room. "Hey, guys! Miss me?"  
  
"I forgot to pack my earplugs," the black haired boy said with a frown.  
  
"You can borrow mine," the boy with a shock of light brown hair falling over   
one eye told him.  
  
"Hi, Duo!" the blond said with a friendly smile.  
  
From the doorway Renya assessed the group with one dark brow raised,   
realizing that she was in for a mess of trouble. Was one form of psychosis   
or another a *requirement* for Gundam pilots?! She shook her head and   
followed Heero into the room.  
  
"*You're* the new pilot?" the black haired one demanded instantly, before   
anyone could even introduce her to the group. "You can't be the new pilot!   
You're a *woman*!"  
  
~And so it begins.~ "You noticed? That's awfully astute of you," she   
replied, taking shelter in sarcasm, her favorite defense mechanism.  
  
"Wufei, that was very rude!" the blond chastised. "I'm Quatre Raberba   
Winner," he told her with a smile similar to the one he'd offered Duo. "You   
must be the new pilot, but I don't think anyone told me your name."  
  
"Her name is Renya Calnar, and her Gundam is Bright Claw. She'll be with us   
from now on," Heero interrupted. "Regardless of your opinions, Wufei, those   
are our orders."  
  
"Please, Heero, I can speak for myself," she said sharply. "Yes, Wufei-san,   
I am a woman, but I'm also a very good pilot. I've spent my entire life   
training, and it's an honor to finally be able to put that to the test in  
battle."  
  
"My name is Trowa," the one with the bangs said, "and you must understand   
that it's not that we disrespect you; we simply don't believe anything until   
we see it for ourselves."  
  
She bowed her head slightly, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. "I  
see. I was given to understand that such a demonstration would be possible   
in the very near future."  
  
"Yes," Heero said quietly. "I received orders while you and Duo were eating.  
Apparently OZ has ordered a large shipment of Gundanium alloy to be sent to   
the Lunar Base. We're to intercept and destroy it."  
  
Duo let out a long, low whistle. "I knew Dr. J would be sendin' us runnin'   
pretty quick, but this is damn convenient, don'tcha think?!"  
  
"There's more. Apparently Zechs Merquise is to be an escort to the ship. He  
is to be eliminated." This last was said with a pointed look at Renya, and   
despite her best efforts she couldn't prevent her face from going pale.  
  
"A test," she murmured softly, turning away from all those questioning,   
accusing, pitying eyes. "Damn him! How dare he do this to me?!" she hissed   
under her breath. "He wants Zechs Merquise dead? Fine. *Mission*   
*accepted*," she declared, turning back with blazing eyes and flushed cheeks.  
  
"One of us could do it, Ren," Duo said cautiously. "It doesn't specify who's  
to kill Zechs... does it?"  
  
"It doesn't have to. Dr. J is no idiot. He knows I owe no allegiance to OZ,   
but that I'm a fool when it comes to listening to my heart. You would call   
me *weak*, Heero, and so would he. Well fine! I'm a weak *woman*, a child   
who has never seen battle, but I *will* follow orders, if only because he   
thinks I won't."  
  
"We can't take a risk of you betraying us," Trowa said after a moment.  
  
"I wouldn't."  
  
"You *did*," Heero pointed out in reference to OZ.  
  
"You wipe out an entire race of people from which I'm partly descended and   
*then* we'll talk about betrayal, ok?"  
  
"What are you talking about?" Wufei demanded, stepping forward from his   
place in the corner, his dark eyes glowing strangely.  
  
The girl glanced at Duo and Heero as she turned to go. "Fill them in. I've   
got work to do." The sound of the door slamming behind her seemed to linger   
in the air for a long, long time.  
  
"I think I'm beginning to see the family resemblance," the braided pilot   
said with a chuckle, plopping down in a nearby chair and blithely ignoring   
Heero's glare.  
  
-------------  
It was several hours later when the knock on her door broke Renya's   
concentration. She let out a long sigh, knowing exactly who it was, and went  
to answer. "What is it, Duo?" she asked wearily. Opening the door, she   
stopped short in surprise. "Oh... well, you're not who I expected."  
  
"Sorry to disappoint," he said quietly, dark blue eyes peering at her   
intently through wild brown bangs as he waited for her to invite him in.  
  
She turned back into the room and he stepped inside, closing the door behind   
him. "So?" she demanded at last, returning to her chair and leaning back   
nonchalantly. "What can I help you with, Heero?"  
  
He avoided the question, instead concentrating on the laptop set upon the   
desk in front of her. "Studying for the mission?"  
  
"Hai," she replied shortly.  
  
"Anything interesting?"  
  
A dark eyebrow rose. "As if you don't know anything and everything about   
what we'll be up against tomorrow. You can't fool me, Heero. Why are you   
here?"  
  
He sighed and sat down on the bed. "You're making a mistake, Renya," he said  
softly, his eyes darkened further by something she couldn't quite define   
because it was so *alien* to him.  
  
"What?" Now that was the last thing she expected: a Heero entreating, a   
Heero humble and almost... caring. Normally he would just threaten to kill   
her if she didn't do as he demanded.  
  
"You shouldn't be a part of this mission. I know Dr. J is testing you, but   
do you really think you could kill Zechs?"  
  
"What's gotten into you, Heero? What happened to following orders,   
completing the mission at all costs?"  
  
He stood swiftly and moved to the open French doors leading out to the   
balcony. He didn't cross the threshold, but stood there staring out over the  
sleeping colony. "If you choke when it comes time to kill Zechs, the mission  
might fail. That's a risk we can't take."  
  
She almost laughed then. "Why do you bother trying to lie to me, Heero?"  
  
"What?!" he demanded icily, spinning to face her.   
  
"I've already proven that I can read you like a book. Why do you bother   
trying to cloak your true intentions with fierce words and the mask of a   
dutiful soldier? You're worried that Zechs will kill me if I choke."  
  
"Only because it would make the mission a failure!"  
  
"Damn it, Heero, will you never admit that you care?! Will you never own up   
to having a heart, to thinking about anything but the stupid mission? You're  
a fool!"  
  
"Caring is a weakness, Renya! You admitted yourself that you care about   
Zechs. Will you be able to kill him on the battlefield tomorrow?! Will you   
be able to overcome your *weaknesses*?"  
  
"Will *you*, brother?!" It was the first time she had ever actually called   
him that, and it gave them both pause. Anger flushed her cheeks, hardened   
his jaw, and amber-green eyes glittered just as dangerously as Prussian blue   
ones. "You care about me," she said more softly, trying to rein in her   
rather unruly temper. "You don't want to see me hurt because you know how   
good Zechs is. I thank you for that, but I can take care of myself. I am   
better than Zechs."  
  
His teeth ground together in fury, but at last he spit out, "*Yes*, you   
damned idiot, I *do* care about you. Do you think that moron Duo has that  
particular market cornered?!"  
  
Her anger dissipated like mist before the summer sun. With a smirk, she   
rose from her chair at last, going over to him and throwing her arms   
around his outraged, protesting form. "I *told* you so!"  
  
"I *am* armed, Renya, and if you don't let go of me this instant, I *will*   
kill you, sister or no."  
  
She did, but not without a giggle that nearly sent his rage into meltdown   
mode.  
  
"Women," he muttered as she stepped around him and out onto the balcony.   
~Maybe Wufei has a point... they seem to be *way* more trouble then they're   
worth.~ After a moment he followed her, leaning against the railing with   
his elbows propped on it, his back to the view she now faced. Despite the  
casual pose, she could sense the tension in every muscle of his body. "Are   
you really better?" he asked at last.  
  
"Yes," she replied, not boasting but simply stating a fact.  
  
"And you'll truly kill him?"  
  
Renya said nothing, and her silence caused him to glance up at her sharply.   
"I will try," she murmured at last, almost like a prayer. Shivering in the   
suddenly cold air, she turned and walked back inside, leaving Heero on the   
balcony to wonder and worry, two sensations almost as foreign to him as   
*caring*.  
---------------  
  
End 5 


	6. Bells and Alarms

My Dark Life part 6  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
Rated PG  
Disclaimers, etc:  
I don't own Gundam Wing. I do own Renya, Bright Claw and the Cal'sha.  
  
I've done this part a little differently in that a lot of it is flashback. I  
hate writing battle scenes (truth? I suck at them), so I figured this way I  
could write as little actual *battle* as possible. Flashbacks are denoted  
with cute little ~*~ thingies. Lovely.  
  
------------  
"And his strong, concealed arms set off bells and alarms  
In the strangest locations in my dark life.  
But the fantasy slipped as he tipped her in cigarettes.  
She tries to smile very graciously when she wants to kill him.  
Now the victory is sweet;  
You get down on your knees.  
It's the perfect position for kissing Western leather."  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
--------------  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
"Ugh," Duo said eloquently, "I hate these stupid space suits! The damn   
helmets make me all claustrophobic, too."  
  
"The helmets? Hell, that hadn't even occurred to me! It's the cockpits I   
worry about," Renya remarked, braiding her long hair so that it would fit   
more easily into the aforementioned headgear.  
  
"You have claustrophobia, Ren?" he asked in some surprise.  
  
She shrugged, grinning. "Apparently it isn't genetic."  
  
"Are you two going to shut up anytime soon so that we can get going?" Heero   
remarked irritably, tossing Renya's helmet at her and moving toward his   
towering Gundam.  
  
She giggled and saluted him. "Yes, sir. Reporting for duty, sir. Thank   
you, sir!"  
  
He shot a glare over his shoulder at her, but she ignored him. With a deep,   
disapproving frown, he said, "You'll find that Quatre's mission plan has been  
uploaded to the cockpit computer. I suggest you study it." With that he   
disappeared inside Wing.  
  
"Is he always this uptight before a mission?"  
  
"He takes his job very seriously."   
  
There was a moment of silence in the hangar before laughter erupted once   
again.  
  
"It's good that someone around here does!" an agitated voice said from behind  
them. Wufei stood at the doorway, glowering like a thundercloud.  
  
"Aw, come on, Wuffie, we were just havin' a little fun. We all need to   
relax, ya know? This mission's gonna be a breeze!"  
  
"I seriously doubt it," he said with a pointed glare at Renya, his ire at   
having a woman along -- especially a woman with a past like this one's --   
canceling out a normally violent reaction to the hated nickname.  
  
"Think what you will, Wufei-san, but I have no intention of doing anything   
that will endanger any of us," she told him, her eyes hard.  
  
"Let's hope so for your sake, woman."  
  
"I have a *name*," she ground out through gritted teeth.  
  
He shrugged and moved toward his own Gundam, Shenlong. "No doubt you do, but  
it's of no concern to me. Stay out of my way, woman, and we'll get along   
just fine."  
  
"Oh, don't pay any attention to ol' Wuffie-boy. He's got a stick up his ass   
about chicks, that's all," Duo told her with a dismissive wave in the Chinese  
pilot's direction.  
  
"I seem to remember you telling me not to pay attention to Heero, either. I   
wish things could be that simple," she replied tartly.  
  
"Yeah, I know, but hey... at least Heero's your brother. That gives you   
automatic permission to beat him up, right?"  
  
"Wrong!" Heero's voice cried from above.  
  
Her good humor restored, she grinned broadly. "Nah, I think it does.   
Besides... I'm probably the only one who *could*. It's nice to have someone   
to keep you in your place, huh, Heero!?"  
  
Silence was her only answer, and she and Duo shared another amused glance   
before going to their Gundams.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~  
  
Had it only been this morning? Renya shook her head, turning away from the   
window, blocking out the sight of the debris-scattered battlefield and   
attempting to block out her memories as well. She tried to hide a wince as   
she reached over to pour herself a cup of water, but the sharp-eyed pilots   
noticed it anyway.  
  
"You should get some rest," Duo said softly, his dark blue, almost violet,   
eyes lacking their normal mischievous sparkle. He had come away from the   
day's events unwounded, but hardly unscathed.  
  
"I'm fine," she replied shortly, sipping from the cup as though it contained   
the finest of wines rather than plain water.  
  
"I don't think any of us are *fine*, Renya-san," Quatre said, his big eyes   
sad and haunted.  
  
She ignored him, instead wandering over to the bunk where a form lay   
stretched out, unconscious. "I can't rest now. I have too much to do." She  
rested a hand against his forehead, ran it across his slicked-back black   
hair, and whispered softly, "Wufei-san, wake up. I can't heal you unless you  
wake up."  
  
Black eyes made wide by pain fluttered open at the sound of her voice. "What  
are you doing... woman?" he managed weakly.  
  
She smiled, happy to see that Chang Wufei was still in there somewhere.   
"It's all right. I need to take your shirt off, ok?"  
  
"My... shirt?" He frowned deeply. "I do not believe that would be   
appropriate."  
  
"Fine. Trowa, take his shirt off." One thing was for certain: she had to   
admire his stubbornness. How many people could scowl so fiercely even with   
the injuries he'd sustained?  
  
The tall boy moved to the Chinese pilot without hesitation, and despite   
Wufei's weak effort to fight Trowa off, he was soon naked to the waist.   
"Injustice!" he hissed. "What are you doing to me, woman!?!"  
  
"I'm saving your life, baka," she murmured, running her hands along his   
chest. Broken ribs... those were always fun... and, just as she suspected, a  
punctured lung. Closing her eyes, she concentrated and gradually the bones   
began to knit back together. After a moment she pulled away, gasping and   
trembling all over, and would have fallen if not for Trowa's quick reflexes.  
"I'm ok," she said sharply, jerking from his supportive grasp. With a long   
sigh, she sank down in a nearby chair.  
  
"What did you do?!" Wufei demanded, sitting up and pressing his hands against  
his ribcage. The pain was gone, and he could breathe normally again. Could   
it be possibly that she had... had healed him with her touch?  
  
"Does it matter? You feel better, don't you? Don't look a gift horse in the  
mouth, Wufei-san," she said, her voice sounding utterly weary and her face   
set in tired lines that made her look far older than her sixteen years.  
  
He sat there a long time, simply staring at her with a deep, mistrustful   
frown. At last he said, "Thank you, Renya-san."  
  
*Well at least some good came out of this day,* she thought ruefully; *Wufei   
now acknowledges that I have a name!* She inclined her head in acceptance of  
his gratitude, but said nothing. She was too damn exhausted for words.  
  
Apparently Duo wasn't. "So what do we do now?" he was saying, trying his   
damnedest to sound cheerful but failing rather horribly.  
  
"We have to get him out," Quatre spoke up quickly.  
  
"He would want us to kill him," Renya supplied in a soft voice.  
  
"Yeah, well, he's just gonna hafta get over that one!" the braided pilot   
proclaimed. "If I'm gonna break into some OZ prison, it's gonna be to break   
him out, not to shoot him! The idiot."  
  
"Either way, they'll be expecting us," Trowa said.  
  
"What choice do we have? We can't just leave him there. He'd do the same   
for any of us."  
  
"Wrong! He'd have no interest in bustin' us out! He'd do that whole killin'  
thing Renya was talkin' about. Thank God I'm nothin' like Heero Yuy!"  
  
With a frown, Renya began to tune out their conversation. They probably   
wouldn't want her along anyway. It was her fault Heero had been captured,   
her fault Wufei was nearly killed. If she hadn't been so damn stupid, if   
she'd only paid closer attention-! She dug her teeth into her lower lip,   
trying not to think about the battle, trying not to remember her own  
failings... the memories rushed over her like a wave, and she felt herself   
drowning.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
It was a trap. They all knew it from the first few moments of battle, but   
they had no choice but to continue fighting. Hell, there probably wasn't   
even any alloy on that damn barge... just a shitload of mobile suits armed to  
the teeth and looking for some Gundams to destroy.  
  
It seemed to Renya -- and the five other pilots, for that matter, though   
they'd most likely never admit it -- that the waves of OZ mobile suits would   
never end. They just kept coming and coming and coming!! For every one she   
clawed or sliced or destroyed, three more would replace it. She   
was Hercules fighting the Hydra... only without the aid of a demigod's   
strength.  
  
Heavyarms was out of ammo. Sandrock was missing an arm, Deathscythe a leg.   
Wufei and Shenlong were currently fighting their way through one of the   
heaviest assaults of Leos, while Renya and Heero fought side by side. Dr. J,  
some part of her supposed, would be proud -- and also rather irked that he'd   
missed a prime opportunity to train the two of them as a *team* of "Perfect   
Soldiers."  
  
And then, seemingly out of nowhere, the Tallgeese swooped down. Shenlong's   
dragon was quickly beheaded with a flashing beam saber, and Renya left   
Heero's side to assist Wufei. She threw Bright Claw between the damaged   
Gundam and the new arrival, and Zechs recognized suit and pilot instantly.  
  
"Renya!" he hissed. "You aren't supposed to be in this battle!"  
  
"What are you talking about?" she demanded.  
  
"We were told you had yet to rendezvous with the other Gundam pilots. I   
wouldn't have come if I had known I would be fighting you!"  
  
"Liar. I know you probably consider me a traitor to OZ and to Treize. I bet  
you're just itching for a chance to go against me."  
  
"Nai, that's not true! We were friends once, you and I. I could not fight   
you."  
  
"This is a war, Zechs. Friend turns against friend, brother against brother,  
lover against lover. It's the way things are done."  
  
She could hear the agony in his voice as he said, "I will not fight you,   
Renya!"  
  
"Then fight *me*, weakling!" It was Wufei.   
  
"No! Wufei-san, Shenlong is damaged! You cannot go against him!"  
  
"Get out of my way, woman!" he cried, knocking her Gundam away with a   
well-swung arm. "Now, Zechs Merquise, let us see if you can beat me!"  
  
Heero wasn't paying attention to the constant chattering over the com -- he'd   
gotten used to tuning it out since fighting with Duo -- but something caught   
his attention. It was Renya, screaming out Wufei's name. Blasting a nearby   
Leo with his beam cannon, he turned quickly in the direction she had gone.   
The sight that met his eyes stopped him cold.  
  
Shenlong, one arm missing, was impaled on Zechs' beam saber. A moment later   
Renya dragged him clear and mauled the front of the Tallgeese with her suit's  
huge claw. "Quatre, Trowa, take care of Wufei. Duo, cover me," Heero said   
quickly.   
  
"What do you expect me to do, Zechs? Just sit by and watch as you kill each   
Gundam pilot one by one?!" she was saying.  
  
"Stop this idiocy, Renya. Come back to OZ! I'm sure if you just explain to   
Treize that Dr. J put you up to this, he would be willing to accept you back.  
Please, Renya!"  
  
"Leave her be, Zechs." Heero's voice cut through the static that followed   
Zechs' plea like a cleaver. "She has no interest in returning to OZ."  
  
"I think that's her decision!"  
  
Before anyone could reply to this, a huge explosion from behind sent the   
small group flying. "What the hell was that?!" Renya cried as she finally   
managed to right herself.  
  
"Beam cannons," Trowa said. "Apparently this little barge isn't as unarmed   
as we were led to believe."  
  
"This isn't like you, Zechs. You're letting others fight your battles now?   
You're turning hundreds of Leos on six Gundams? You're firing beam cannons   
at damaged suits? Where has your honor gone?!" she hissed dangerously.   
Then suddenly cried out as her suit was hit with cannon fire. She felt   
something warm and sticky oozing down her side and looked down to discover   
a tear in her space suit, the skin beneath it ripped and bleeding.  
  
"Go!" Heero cried, seeing the damage she had taken. "Take the others and go,  
Renya. There's nothing you can do here. I'll take care of Zechs." Wing,   
she noticed, was more or less intact.  
  
"I won't leave you!" They were still vastly outnumbered, especially now that  
the barge was firing on them, and she honestly feared for him in a fight   
against the Tallgeese.  
  
He leveled his beam cannon at her. "Go, Renya, or I fire. Don't test me."  
  
"Ren, come on! There's nothin' we can do! Heero can take care of himself!"   
Duo cried, reaching out to grab her Gundam with his own.  
  
"Let go!" she screamed desperately. "We can't just leave him here! He'll   
die!"  
  
"Nah, he's too damn stubborn. Besides, don't you know how valuable we   
Gundam pilots are? They'll take him prisoner before they kill him."  
  
And so she was unceremoniously dragged from the battlefield and away, Quatre   
(with his good arm) and Duo clearing a path through the Leos as they went.  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"We should never have left him," she whispered, not really even conscious of   
the fact that she was speaking aloud.  
  
"We had no choice," Quatre said gently, resting a hand on her arm. "If we   
had stayed, we all would have been captured or killed. That's not what Heero  
would have wanted."  
  
"You talk about him as if he was dead!" she snarled suddenly, jumping up from  
the table despite the painful wound in her side.  
  
"He is, or as good as," Trowa said mildly.  
  
"I won't believe that."  
  
"We'll get him out, Ren," Duo told her with a smile.  
  
She sighed and sat back down, this time on the bunk Wufei had recently   
vacated. "We were set up. The whole thing was one big trap... but Zechs   
said I wasn't supposed to be there. What does that mean? Were they hoping   
to get the five of you, thus taking the wind out of my sails and causing me   
to return to OZ?"  
  
Duo shrugged and leaned back in his chair. "I don't know. Maybe they   
thought you'd be willing to trade yourself for the five of us or something.   
Though I don't think they'd let all *five* Gundam pilots go for just one   
person... even if that person is as pretty as you, babe!"  
  
She ignored him, a new idea suddenly occurring to her, an idea so horrible   
that she turned alarmingly pale. "Oh Gods... Duo, you're right," she   
murmured. "That's what they're going to do with Heero! A trade... me for   
him... it's a win-win for OZ. If I accept the trade, they have me back...   
and, hell, they might kill him anyway. If I don't, they still have 01 and   
its pilot. I'm such an idiot."  
  
"No," Wufei said forcefully, surprising them all. "If that is OZ' plan, then  
perhaps we should strike first, get Heero out of prison before they have a   
chance to even propose such a trade."  
  
"We don't even know where he is," Quatre remarked ruefully, running a hand   
through his pale blonde hair.   
  
"Then we find him," Trowa said with a quiet, confident authority.  
  
"Ohhh, well, when you put it *that* way!" Duo remarked sarcastically.   
  
"They probably took him to the barge, wouldn't you think?"  
  
"How are we supposed to get close to it? We've got about a Gundam and a half  
between the five of us!"  
  
"Gentlemen," she interrupted sharply, "it's too late to be arguing over such   
things tonight. Why don't we all get some sleep and discuss it in the   
morning?"  
  
"See?" Duo said with a glare in Trowa's direction. "Now *that's* a plan!"  
  
----------  
Sleep was proving quite the elusive query that night, not that Renya was very  
surprised. Every time she closed her eyes she saw the battle being played   
out before her. She could hear the screams of the men she killed, feel the   
heat inside the cockpit as she worked harder and harder against so many   
suits... she felt again the anguished leap her heart had taken at the sight   
of Zechs Merquise and his infamous Tallgeese.   
  
With a deep sigh, she pulled herself up from the bed and went to the balcony,  
flinging open the French doors and stepping out into the cool night air. It   
had been over twenty-four hours since she'd stood here with Heero, and now...  
and now Heero was gone. The Gods only knew if their insane escape plan --   
yet to even be hatched, of course -- could possibly succeed. She shook her   
head and was on her way back to bed when a flashing light on her laptop   
caught her eye.  
  
She hit the blinking button and read the message displayed. "Well, well,   
well," she murmured under her breath, "isn't this a surprise? You didn't   
waste any time, did you?" She considered waking the others -- or at least   
Duo -- but quickly decided against it. Grabbing a jacket, Renya slapped the   
lid of the computer closed and hurried out the door.  
  
---------------  
"I'm surprised you decided to come," he said in his deep, silky voice as she   
slid into the booth across from him.  
  
"Where's your face?" she asked, ignoring his comment. It was the first time   
in years she had seen him without that infernal contraption he usually wore,   
and she wanted to know why.  
  
He hitched a shoulder and waved the waitress over to refill his coffee.   
After she left, he said, "Who doesn't know the masked face of Zechs   
Merquise? It was too conspicuous." He added a little sugar and stirred the   
black liquid before taking a sip.  
  
"And this," she said, reaching across to grab a lock of pale hair and holding  
it up for his inspection, "isn't?"   
  
"We all have our Marks, Renya. Sometimes it's less conspicuous to let them   
show;" he tapped a finger against the black bracelet below the hand holding   
his hair; "and sometimes it isn't."  
  
She let go and leaned away from the table to stare at him for a long,   
assessing moment. "What do you want, Zechs?" she demanded at last.  
  
A smile that more closely resembled a grimace crossed his features before he   
looked up at her through wild white-blond bangs. "I want to negotiate a   
trade."  
  
She let out a little snort of laughter and took a sip from his cup of coffee.  
"A trade? Indeed. Why am I not surprised?"  
  
Now his smile was genuine, and she felt soft warmth glowing from his normally  
icy blue eyes. "You always did have a knack for knowing what I was   
thinking," he reminded her.  
  
She looked away quickly, not wanting to be reminded of the past, of a time   
when they were friends, a time when she had been caught up in her girlish   
infatuation with mysterious, handsome Zechs Merquise. Now he was her enemy,   
not her friend, and he was here to offer a trade of her life for that of her   
newly found brother's. No, *this* Zechs Merquise was certainly no friend of   
hers. "Get on with it, Zechs. I didn't come here to reminisce."  
  
His expression went hard in an instant. "You know what I'm going to say,   
Renya-san. OZ wants you back, and they're willing to sacrifice the pilot of   
01 in order to get you."  
  
She took another sip of the cooling coffee before returning it to the saucer   
in front of him and sliding out of the booth. "I'm sorry, Merquise-san, but  
we have nothing to say to one another."  
  
He jumped up and grabbed her wrist, pulling her toward him. She struggled   
against his grip, but he threw an arm around her waist to keep her close. As  
he tightened his hold, the arm pressed against her injured side. Letting out  
a hiss of pain, she pulled away quickly. "You're hurt," he said in   
bewilderment.  
  
"Of course I am, you fool," she growled. "Don't you remember the beam   
cannons that were shooting at us? I was hit!"  
  
"I didn't know."  
  
"Well now you *do*!"  
  
The other patrons of the small cafe were beginning to look at the two   
askance, so he pushed her into the booth and slid in beside her, despite her  
protests. "No, I mean I didn't know about the beam cannons," he explained   
quietly. "I was told they wouldn't be used during the battle unless things   
became desperate. As far as I could tell, they were completely unnecessary   
at that stage."  
  
"Zechs, let me go," she said, ignoring his explanation. "You know I'm not   
going to believe any offer from OZ about 01's life. Do you expect me to be   
so naive as to think OZ would be willing to give up one of the Gundam pilots   
just for *me*?"  
  
"It's trading one Gundam pilot for another," he said as though it was   
obvious.  
  
Her amber-green eyes narrowed. "What?"  
  
He put an arm around her shoulders and leaned in close to whisper the words   
in her ear. He hoped to give the impression to the curious customers that   
they were merely lovers having a spat, and now they were making up. "Treize   
isn't behind this," he murmured, seeming intent on the girl next to him even  
though his ice blue eyes scanned the room for eavesdroppers. "They want you   
back not to restore you to your former position; they simply consider you   
something that rightfully *belongs* to them. Your DNA is too valuable to be   
lost, Ren," he continued, realizing full well how the words would hurt her,   
but not knowing any other way to get his point across.  
  
She stiffened and stared up at him with eyes spitting amber fire. "Do they   
mean to kill me?" she whispered furiously, struggling to contain her anger.   
"Or do they plan to simply lock me in some laboratory and do tests on me for   
the rest of my life? Do they mean to use what they've created in me to   
create someone *new* to do their dirty work? I'm simply not *droid* enough   
for them? And you! You knew about this and came to offer me the trade   
anyway?! What would you have done had I accepted?"  
  
"I knew you wouldn't," he replied simply, weathering the storm of her rage   
with a stoic discipline forged from years of military training.  
  
"Oh, you know me so *well* then, Zechs Merquise?!" she hissed.  
  
"I know you care for 01, and I know you value his life -- and, indeed, the   
lives of all the pilots -- above your own. You've always been that way,   
Renya."  
  
She subsided into sulky silence for a moment. "Why are you telling me this?"  
she asked at last, her voice sullen and cross.  
  
"I thought you should know. Consider it extra incentive to not get caught   
when you come to rescue your lost comrade," he told her, a trace of amusement  
lightening his low voice.  
  
Renya glanced up at him quickly. "What makes you think--"  
  
"Don't," he interrupted, pressing surprisingly elegant fingers against her   
lips. "I won't interfere when you come for him, but next time we meet in   
battle, I won't hesitate to kill you."  
  
"Zechs, I--" She stopped herself and looked away, chewing nervously on her   
lower lip, not knowing quite what to say. Why was he doing this? Why did he  
care what happened to Heero? Suddenly a new thought occurred to her: it   
wasn't *Heero* he cared about at all. It was she. This realization   
surprised her into looking up at him again.  
  
He was watching her with a tender, haunted expression on his face, and when   
he caught the look in her amber-green eyes, he smiled softly. "I know, Ren,"  
he murmured before she could say anything. He leaned over and pressed his   
lips against hers for a moment that seemed to last an eternity. Then, with   
another of his rare smiles, he slid from the booth and tossed some money down  
onto the table for the coffee. "Look to the moon, Renya-chan," he told her   
cryptically before turning in a swirl of white hair and black coat and   
leaving the cafe.  
-------------  
  
End 6 


	7. The Carnival is Over

My Dark Life part 7  
by Raven Moon  
MrBeanRulz@aol.com  
Rated PG-13 (Duo gets a little mouthy...)  
Disclaimers 'n' such:  
Wahwahwah wahwah wahwahwah! Wah wahwahwahwah wahwah wah. Wahwah. (That's   
Charlie Brown teacher-speak, in case you can't tell)  
  
Ahhh, the last part of My Dark Life! When I started this story, it was   
something I was writing just for me. I wasn't going to post it anywhere   
or send it to any mailing lists or anything, so a lot of the early stuff   
is really self-indulgent. I guess I didn't get away from that very much,   
though. :) Oh well... if you can't make yourself happy, then what's the   
point of pleasing anyone else?  
  
Anyway, in case you hadn't noticed, the song has no chorus, and the verse  
for this section just kinda... ends. It's really strange and different from  
the other verses, and I kinda wanted this section of the story to reflect   
that as well. Not so much the strange and different part, I mean, but the  
ending thing. Perhaps one day I'll write a sequel or something... who knows.  
Let's at least wait until As You Like It is over before I think about that!!  
  
C&C always welcome and appreciated! Thanks. :)  
------------  
"So they came from Ugly, Texas,  
And from Nameless, Tennessee,  
From Peculiar, Missouri,  
And from places closer to me.  
All the cream of heartless England cheered,  
'The carnival is over.'  
The remnant of red army bandsmen played 'America the Beautiful.'"  
-from "My Dark Life" by Elvis Costello  
-------------  
  
Duo was sitting in her room when she opened the door nearly an hour later.   
After the meeting with Zechs, Renya felt she needed some time to clear her   
head. A long walk around the city had accomplished that, but now she had to   
deal with the rather angry-looking American perched in her desk chair. She   
let out a long sigh and tossed her coat onto the bed. "It's late, Duo. What  
are you doing here?"  
  
"Where have you been?" he demanded.  
  
"I didn't know I had to inform you of every one of my exits and entrances. I  
couldn't sleep, so I went for a walk."  
  
"Alone?" he asked accusingly.  
  
She frowned at him, startled. This wasn't like the Duo she had come to know.  
Then she caught sight of the opened laptop on the desk and her eyes widened.  
She had definitely closed it before leaving. "Have you been going through my  
mail?!" she hissed.  
  
He looked away guiltily. "I was worried!"  
  
"Worried?! Is that the new term for it?! I would think something like   
*suspicious* would be more appropriate! Do you think I set you up today,   
Maxwell?"  
  
"Hey!" he cried, jumping up. "I never said that! Don't jump to conclusions,  
Renya! Or is *guilt* making you say these things?!"  
  
"Guilt over what? Over Heero? Over Wufei? Yeah, Duo, I feel guilty about   
that, but I'm not a spy! If you don't trust me, why did you bring me here?"  
  
"I've been asking myself that all *fucking* day!" he practically screamed.  
  
She fell back, startled. "Duo--"  
  
"Let me finish!" he snarled. "Yeah, I read your damn mail. I came to talk   
to you and you weren't here, so I let myself in. It wasn't hard... the locks  
in these places are crappy. I saw that your laptop was still on, so I opened  
it up. The letter from... well, I can only assume it was Zechs because I   
don't know for sure... but it was on the top.  
  
"It's not that I don't trust you," he continued, turning away and rubbing the  
back of his neck tiredly. "It's just that... why did you go, Ren? What was   
the point? Why were you gone so long? I've been here over an hour!  
  
"You're right about one thing, though. I wish I hadn't brought you here. I   
wish I'd never met you. I wish Heero and I hadn't transferred to that   
fucking school, that we hadn't passed you in the hall or invaded your lunch   
space... I wish I'd lived the rest of my life without ever having heard the   
name 'Renya Calnar.'"  
  
She let out a little gasp and moved toward him tentatively, hand   
outstretched. Her fingers just barely brushed the black fabric covering his   
shoulder before she dropped her arm with a sad frown. "Zechs wanted to offer  
me the trade we discussed earlier. I was right about that... but not for the  
reasons I suspected. He told me that OZ wants me back because I'm too   
important a scientific breakthrough for them to loose."   
  
Her voice was so bitter that he felt his heart breaking in two. He struggled  
vainly to ignore it, to keep himself hard and cold and aloof. How the hell   
did Heero do it?!  
  
"He set up the meeting to warn me, Duo, to tell me that I shouldn't accept   
the stupid offer and should run like hell... but at the same time he knew I   
never would. I think... I think he told me where Heero's being held, too."  
  
"And you believe him?!" he demanded, aghast, as he spun around toward her.  
  
She felt the sting of his braid against her cheek like a whip and winced.   
"Yeah, I do. He said he wouldn't interfere when we went to rescue him."  
  
"Why should we trust Zechs Merquise, Renya?! He's the one who captured Heero  
in the first place!"  
  
She shrugged. "Don't trust Zechs. Trust *me*." How could she tell him the   
reason behind her faith in Zechs? He was not only a top officer in the OZ   
army, but also a close personal friend of Treize Khushrenada... on the   
surface, no one outside of OZ had *any* reason to trust Zechs. But she,   
Renya Calnar, genetically engineered half-breed and outcast, trusted him all   
the same. She had seen the affection in his eyes, had felt the caring when   
he kissed her. She knew she wasn't in love with him, that he would never be   
in love with her, but still they shared a bond... a bond that Duo would   
probably misunderstand, a bond that might very well break his heart.  
  
There was something in her eyes... something strange. He tried to puzzle   
through it, and when he hit upon the answer, he stepped back from her,   
stumbling over the bed and falling onto it before righting himself and   
continuing back until he came to the far wall of the room. "Renya... how   
could you?!" he gasped, unable to say anything else, unable to express the   
pain that ripped through him.  
  
Her eyes widened. "Oh, Duo, no!! No, please, listen! It's not like   
that..." He *had* misunderstood! But how had he figured things out so   
quickly? Perhaps he was a little less self-centered than she had originally   
given him credit for. "Onegai, Duo-chan, matte! I can explain!"  
  
"*What* can you explain, Renya?" he demanded, his former anger returning ten   
fold. His eyes blazed bright blue with it, and she felt herself trembling.   
"Explain to me. Explain how he isn't as bad as we think he is. Explain how   
he has a reason for fighting against us. Explain how he smiled at you and   
told you how beautiful you are and kissed you and made you fall in love with   
him!" he cried in anguish.  
  
"Nai! Duo, no! I'm not in love with Zechs! I care for him, I always have;   
I'm not going to lie to you about that. Oh Gods, Duo, are you such a fool   
that you can't see what's right in front of you?!" she cried in desperation   
when he seemed unmoved be her explanation.  
  
"I *am* seeing what's in front of me! He offered you this stupid deal, you   
refused, he told you where Heero is... all that took over an hour?! I'm not   
stupid, Renya!!"  
  
"Yes you are! You're the biggest idiot I've ever met in my entire life, and   
frankly I regret your transferring, too!! You wish you'd never met me?   
Well, I'll tell ya that's the feeling's mutual!"  
  
"Good!! At least we agree on something!"  
  
"Get out!" she growled dangerously. "Get out of my room right now before I   
*throw* you out!"  
  
Forgetting for a moment who he was talking to, Duo crossed his arms over his   
chest and smirked broadly. "I'd like to see you try," he challenged smugly.  
  
She leaped across the bed with a snarl, fully intending to take him up on his  
invitation by literally throwing him from the room, but the moment she laid   
hands on him she snapped. "I hate you!" she hissed, slapping him hard across  
the face and turning away. A moment later she buried her face in her hands   
and began to sob.  
  
Stunned by the blow, he rubbed his cheek wonderingly a moment before   
realizing that she was crying. That surprised him almost more than the slap.  
He stood quietly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other and staring   
at her bent, shaking back. Should he say something? No, that might make   
things worse... she had just hit him and declared her hatred for him. Maybe   
he should just leave.   
  
He started to move toward the door, but realized that he'd either have to   
walk right past her or crawl over the bed. Though the latter seemed rather   
awkward, it was certainly a more appealing choice than risking a punch. He   
considered himself lucky to have escaped the fate of Dr. J.  
  
Duo scratched his head, toed the carpet with his black boot, and at last   
cleared his throat politely. She didn't respond, so he did it again, louder.  
  
"Go 'way," she said, this time her voice choked with tears instead of sleep.  
  
"No," he replied softly but firmly, surprising even himself.  
  
"Why not?" she demanded. "Did I not hit you hard enough? You think I'm in   
love with someone else, I told you I hate you, I slapped you... what else   
does a girl have to do to get some peace around here?" She turned around   
again, wiping at her wet eyes furiously and doing her best to glare at him at  
the same time.  
  
He fought the urge to chuckle, and instead pulled a tissue from the box on   
the nightstand. She snatched it from his hand and he said, "So you aren't in  
love with Zechs?"  
  
"No, stupid."  
  
"But you hate me for thinking that you were?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Oh... so you just hate me in general?" He was beginning to enjoy this now.  
  
She scowled at him, and he braced himself for a blow that never came. "I   
don't hate you at *all*, you blithering moron."   
  
"Then why did you say it?" he asked innocently. "And why did you hit me?"   
He rubbed at his sore cheek again and hoped that the mark would fade before   
Wufei saw him.  
  
"You deserved it. And besides, you said you wish you'd never met me! That's  
just as bad!"  
  
"You said both!"  
  
Renya let out a cry of frustration and stormed out onto the balcony. She had  
to put some space between herself and Duo before she strangled him with his   
own braid. Taking in deep gulps of the cool air and leaning against the   
railing, she tried to calm the storm of emotions brewing inside of her. She   
had to think. She had to be careful before she said something completely   
stupid, something she would never be able to take back.  
  
But then he was beside her, so close that their shoulders pressed against   
each other. "I guess you wanna know why I said it."  
  
She closed her eyes, trying to block out the comforting heat of his arm   
against hers. "I don't care."  
  
"Sure you don't," he teased, grinning.  
  
She felt a blush rising in her cheeks and thanked the Gods it was too dark to  
see well out here. "Then enlighten me," she said brusquely.  
  
"I love you." He said it simply, sweetly, and she knew it was the truth.  
  
"What?!" she cried, jumping away from him and holding up her hand in a   
warding gesture. "Have you gone *nuts*, Duo?!"  
  
He smiled a little ruefully and shrugged. "Yeah, I guess maybe I have. You   
stand there hurling insults at me, hitting me, telling me you hate me and   
wish you'd never met me... you cry and you scream and, hell, I'm surprised   
you haven't thrown anything yet! But I realized that I don't really give a   
damn about your temper, except that it's just another thing I love about   
you. The reason I wish I'd never met you is because if I hadn't you wouldn't  
be here right now. I wouldn't have to worry about you getting hurt or   
killed, and you wouldn't be agonizing over how to rescue Heero."  
  
"Oh Gods," she whispered in a shaking little voice. "Duo, please, you can't   
do this to me! You don't understand--"  
  
"Ya know, Renya, I'm getting sick of you trying to talk your way out of   
actually *feeling* something." With that, he grabbed her by either arm and   
pulled her close. "Shut up for a minute and just *live*," he whispered,   
kissing her hard.  
  
She pushed him away almost violently and turned her back on him. "No, Duo.  
I care for you more than I can say, but I..." She shook her head slowly and   
tried to come up with words that wouldn't sound trite and foolish. At last,   
swallowing hard, she turned back to his stunned face, his wide, hurt eyes.   
"I love you, Duo, but I'm not *in* love with you. I need your friendship so   
much...I can't risk losing you...I need you to understand that this sort of   
relationship is just not one I can have right now. You're the only friend   
I've ever really had, the only person I've trusted enough to tell my secrets   
to. Please, Duo...please let our friendship be enough."  
  
He took a step back and looked away, not wanting her to see the tears brightening   
his dark blue eyes. "I thought there was something here, Ren," he finally   
whispered.  
  
"There is!" she cried sadly. "It just isn't what you want it to be. Can't   
we just be friends, Duo-chan? Or at least can't this wait until after some   
of this craziness settles down?"  
  
"Yeah, Renya," he muttered, "we can be friends. I'm sorry about this."  
  
"Duo, wait!" she called as he hurried to the door, but it was too late. He   
slammed it behind him and she frowned deeply, wondering if she'd just lost her   
only friend.  
  
  
-----------  
"The Lunar Base? What would give you that idea?" Quatre asked upon Renya's   
announcement the next morning.  
  
She shrugged. "It makes the most sense. Think about it: it's a heavily   
armed fortress complete with plenty of troops and mobile suits. It's easier   
to defend than a barge, and tougher to get in and out of, as well."  
  
"Especially with Gundams," Trowa commented, carefully studying the blueprints  
Renya had displayed on the projector screen. They were old, out of date, but  
the best she could do on such short notice.   
  
"We can't take the Gundams; they'd be more of a liability than an asset with   
the condition they're in. We've got to move fast and be as invisible as   
possible. Gundams are too conspicuous," she said, remembering Zechs'   
comments about marks from the evening before.  
  
"So how do we get in?" Duo wanted to know.  
  
"That's the sticky part. At least one of us has to stay behind and hack into  
the OZ mainframe. We need access to security codes, door locks, maps...   
everything. We have to decide who is staying and who's going. I'm a good   
hacker - Dr. J insisted on it - but I feel that I owe it to Heero to go to   
the Base."  
  
"I'll stay," Quatre volunteered. "I'm not one much for breaking and entering  
anyway," he said with a little grin.  
  
"Good. First thing we need a shuttle, then the docking codes. We'll land at  
the Lunar Base and just-"  
  
"Walk in? Do you really think that'll work?!" Duo asked with a frown.  
  
"Got a better idea? If we had our Gundams we could just blast our way in...   
except then they might kill Heero just to spite us. I've thought about this   
very carefully, gentlemen, and I think stealth and subtlety is the best way   
to go in this case. I'm open for suggestions, though."  
  
Silence filled the room until Wufei said, "It's a sound plan. It has its   
risks, but fewer than trying to fight our way through with damaged suits."  
  
She nodded and tried to quell the pride that swelled within her, but for some  
reason Wufei's approval had come to mean a lot in the short time she had   
known him. "Well then... let's get started, boys."  
  
--------  
"Ya'd think they'd be a little more careful about who they let just *waltz*   
in here," Duo remarked into her ear a few hours later.  
  
"You'd *think*. I guess they simply expect attack rather than infiltration,   
ne?" Renya tugged at the blue jacket of her stolen OZ uniform with a frown.  
She had never worn one of these and had recently figured she never would.   
The Gods, she decided wryly, truly did have a warped sense of humor.  
  
"We should split up," Trowa said, checking the hall carefully for   
soldiers.  
  
"Indeed," she agreed. "You and I will take care of Heero. Duo, you   
and Wufei work on getting Wing, ok?" The two nodded and Duo mockingly   
saluted her with a small, sad smile. She chuckled, but watched them   
go with a small sigh. "Come on, Barton," she said to her companion.  
"Time's a-wastin' and none of us are gettin' any younger."   
  
"Do you think he's ok? You don't think they've killed him, have they?"   
he asked, his voice filled with uncharacteristic worry.  
  
"No," she said with finality, "they haven't killed him. If they were   
going to do that they would've made it public."  
  
"And risk turning another Heero Yuy into a martyr?"  
  
She smiled briefly in admiration. "The Alliance isn't very popular   
right now, truly told, but we're on the verge of a coup. Once OZ   
takes over, I believe their first task will be dealing with the Gundam   
pilots.In order to prevent our deaths from being, as you point out,   
martyrdom, they will first vilify us to the people, make us look   
like evil killers with no regard to anything but making war."  
  
"But we're fighting for the colonies," he insisted.  
  
"You know that, I know that...hell, even OZ knows that, but how easy  
do you think it will be for them to convince said colonies that you're   
fighting for no one but yourselves? Everyone is desperate for peace   
right now, Trowa...they'll buy the party line because it'll be what   
they want to hear. Hell, Treize has been planning this for years...you   
Gundam boys – and now me, I guess – are just minor bumps in the road,   
easily gotten around."   
  
"So what will we do?" he asked, deeply troubled by this new information.  
  
She glanced back at him with a grin. "Don't let ourselves be gotten   
around."  
  
Her smile was infectious, and he found himself returning it. "Yeah,   
I guess that's a plan. Whoa..hey, look at that," he interrupted   
himself, pointing down the hallway they were currently in. Three   
uniformed guards were milling around in front of a barred door, and   
upon sighting them, jumped to attention.  
  
"No one is allowed on this corridor, soldiers," one of them said crisply.  
  
"Oh, really?" Renya said, making her voice as saccharine as possible.   
"I guess we just got lost. You know how it is in this big ol' base!"  
She giggled and noticed with satisfaction as the guard's eyes cut over   
to her. He relaxed a little bit and she offered him her most charming   
smile. "We were on our way to the mess, but my friend here took a wrong   
turn. Maybe you could help me?"  
  
"Uh...the mess? Oh...um...yeah...just go to the end of this corridor,   
take a left, then your second right, your third left..." He noticed her   
blank stare and said, "Maybe I should just walk you."  
  
"Oh could you?! That would be so wonderful!!"  
  
"Sure, fine, I was on my way here to relieve you anyway," Trowa said   
gruffly, knocking the guy on the back. "Have fun!"  
  
"Uh, yeah, thanks, buddy," the guard said, falling in step beside Renya.  
  
"You can thank me later!" he called with a wicked, very   
unTrowa-like grin. That guy might not even remember her after the   
concussion she was most likely gonna give him... Remembering his reason   
for being there in the first place, he cleared his throat and said,   
"So, whom do we have in here? No one will give me any information as to   
why he's so important."  
  
One of the other guards, an older soldier who had watched the previous   
exchange with amusement, shrugged. "I don't know, some kid. The   
Lightning Count brought him in earlier, and we were told to keep a   
strict eye on him. Apparently he's pretty dangerous, though he seemed  
kinda out of it when they brought him in."  
  
"Out of it?" Trowa asked, careful to keep his voice neutral despite   
the fact that his heart had stopped beating and was lodged in his throat.  
  
"He'd been worked over pretty good from the looks of things," the third   
one said with a leer.  
  
Before Trowa could reply, a muffled cry was heard from the direction   
Renya and the other guard had gone. "What the hell?!" the older one   
said. "You two stay here, I'll go check things out!" He took off down   
the corridor and Trowa casually drew his gun and smacked it against the   
back of the third guard's head. With barely a sound, he crumpled to   
the floor.  
  
The second guard, meanwhile, rounded the corner to find the first one   
lying in a heap. Before he could react, something pounced on him from   
above. He got the impression of cat-like green eyes and vicious claws   
before the world went black around him.  
  
Trowa frowned slightly as he examined the locking mechanism on the door.   
It was a retina-scan design, and he doubted it was programmed with the   
eyes of any of the three unconscious guards. "How are we going to get   
in?" he asked as Renya came up behind him.  
  
She answered his frown with one of her own and began typing a series of   
numbers into the keypad below the scanner. "Zechs is pretty predictable.  
He hates having little laser beams pointed at his eyeballs, so he always   
programs in a manual code." There was a click and the heavy door   
opened silently on its well-oiled hinges. "And it's always the same,"   
she said with a satisfied grin.  
  
The room was pitch black, so she opened the door as wide as possible   
to let in the light from the hallway. Narrowing her eyes and employing   
her night vision, she scanned the round chamber and gasped. "There,   
by the back wall," she said for Trowa's benefit. She hurried over and   
knelt down beside Heero, examining his prone form carefully. "He's   
unconscious and pretty bad off. Gods, what did they do to him!?" she   
demanded desperately.  
  
"Come on, Renya," the light-haired pilot hissed from his position at   
the door, "we've got to go! Pick him up and bring him!"  
  
"He can't be moved in this condition, Trowa. I have to help him."  
  
"No!" he cried, remembering how weak healing Wufei had left her.   
"If you try to heal him, you'll only hurt yourself. We've got to move   
now!"  
  
"I have no choice." She pressed her hands against his head, feeling   
the concussion the guards had left him with, and sent her healing energy   
into his body. This was worse than Wufei. A concussion, especially   
one this severe, was a tricky matter. One false step and she'd leave   
him brain damaged for life.  
  
Suddenly his hands came up and clamped around her wrists in a vice-like   
grip. She gasped and tried to pull away, but he only held on tighter.   
Feeling the delicate bones grind together, she clenched her teeth against   
the pressure. The healing energy flowed stronger between them, and she   
felt herself being drained painfully. "Let go, Heero, let go of me!" she   
whispered urgently, knowing that the connection had to be broken soon.  
  
Just as violently as he had grabbed her, he let go. With a pained moan,   
she slumped to the floor. "Renya!" Heero cried, sitting up quickly to   
grab her before her head hit the hard metal.  
  
"What's going on?!" Trowa demanded, moving over to join them.   
"What did you do to her, Heero?!"  
  
"Nothing! I didn't do anything!" he asserted desperately, his voice   
uncommonly raw and frightened.  
  
An alarm went off somewhere deep within the base, and the two pilots   
started in surprise. "That must be Wufei and Duo," Trowa said.   
"We sent them to get Wing. Is she ok?" he asked, kneeling down next   
to them.  
  
"I don't know. We should get her to a doctor."  
  
"That bad? Come on, we've got to get out've here before the cavalry   
descends." He motioned for Heero to take Renya and hurried to the door.   
  
Before he was halfway there, however, a voice cut through the darkness   
with icy precision. "I think you'll find, gentlemen, that the cavalry is   
already here."  
  
Heero closed his eyes and let out a long, angry sigh as he recognized   
the voice: Treize Khushrenada himself stood in the doorway of Heero's cell,   
and half the OZ army seemed to be with him.   
  
  
End 7/7  
  
Well, well, well... hope you enjoyed it. Told you it would end abruptly.   
Interested in a sequel?! Tell me so!!! 


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